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first day with the going-to-sleep-well-for-the-babysitter chart; first sticker
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Ever since he got his big boy bed a couple months ago, David has been going to bed smoothly. No lying next to him on the floor for hours, no fights over the number of stories. No grief. That's for us. He gives the babysitters lots and lots of grief. And usually falls asleep two hours past bedtime in some remote corner of his room or on the living room couch. We've been managing the problem by not going out until post-bedtime.

That wasn't a long term solution, so we brought out the chart last night. You know me, the Alfie Kohn devotee, the don't punish by rewards and motivation should be intrinsic. Well, he has plenty of intrinsic motivation to learn how to balance on the side table and reach the dust buster on top of the freezer; he needed some external push for this one.

A friend asked why does he get so upset when one of us isn't there to put him to bed?
Solving that would be a different way around the problem. He definitely misses us. It freaks him out to have us gone, even with Rose there. He also doesn't like the change in routine, and I think, the behavior has become a bad habit.

The fact that on his very first try he was able to earn a sticker shows me the misery of missing us wasn't the overriding factor. The babysitter said he did start to cry, but when she and Rose reminded him of the chart, he pulled it together.

I'm very proud of him. He's very proud of himself. He's grooving on his present—a Spider Man book from the dollar store. Most importantly, if this keeps up, it means when John and I leave town in a few weeks (long story, different entry), he'll get a reasonable amount of sleep and be a little bit happier. So will the babysitter.



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