Editor's note: Please excuse Dickie as he thinks out loud. 'Should be interesting. And by interesting we mean not interesting.

So I've been staring through this application for a couple of hours - the Global Journalism application, that is.

I just dunno...

It's due tomorrow.

I just don't know if I want to do it.

But I'll feel like a schmuck if I don't.

"You're missing out on a rich experience."

Blah blah.

Sure I want to go to Cuba.

Or Argentina.

Or wherever.

And I could get by on my Spanish.

But let's be honest: "Get by" is not gonna cut it.

When you're interviewing people.

Many times over the phone.

For publication.

...Right?

I mean, what happens when I get down there and I realize I totally bit off more than I can chew.

And I don't mean in, like, a "whoa this is gonna be hard sort of way."

I mean, "Holy shit, I'm stuck in ____ and there is seriously no way I can do this. My eyes were bigger than my...language skills."

Plus I'm feeling the pinch.

I'm gonna need to get a job. Soon.

Going global could throw off that momentum, going from 4Q into gainful employment.

Throw off what this was all about.

(What was this all about, again?)

I mean, it's not like I'm looking to write abroad.

Not to mention, that's a lot of extra bucks. A lot.

And it's not like I can just toss in the application and say, "What do you have to lose, just apply!"

Start with the $150 deposit.

It's just, the more I think about this, the more of a headache it is. The more stress I feel.

Look, I just want to settle down, write for a premier daily, raise some crops, and, God-willing, a family.

Gah!

Somebody tell me what to do.

Please.

Quickly.