Just about every year, we are seasonally invaded by ants. We've tried the little bait things that are supposed to taste yummy so the ants take poison back to the nest and kill them all, but they take a long time and, to be honest, I really have nothing against ants in general; I just don't want them in the house. Therefore, my method of eradication is pretty straightforward: I squish 'em.

But after the first couple of hundred or so, it starts to get old (especially because these particular ants smell really, really bad when you squish 'em.) So we're trying some other things as well. (Haven't gotten to the boric acid yet because it seems like it could easily get messy.)

I know that nothing is foolproof. I know that bugs are, for the most part, pretty hardy, resourceful creatures.

But to run and hide under the supposedly prophylactic bay leaf?

Now, that's just being cheeky.