I've been feeling really insecure and wired during the past few days, for a whole variety of reasons. I'm still sick, and I'm really, really bored with it (I actually find myself really wanting to get back to work, and for more than just the usual paranoid fears--what if they think I'm too sickly and wish they hadn't hired me????? what if--???? --ad nauseum); I'm frustrated I haven't been able to do any more work on my thesis this past week, since I've been ill and fuzzy-headed; I haven't been sleeping very well (see reasons number one & two); I'm waiting to hear back from my agent on the revisions to Masks & Shadows; it's been a looooooooong time since I've gotten a short story acceptance...oof. Plus, I've run out of reading material, which leaves me with far too much empty time on my hands, most of which I'm using to worry about things.

So. Lots of neuroses over here.

Patrick took me out to Borders this morning, though, to get me out of the house for an hour and to stockpile some new books to read. (Good comfort reading, all: The Essential Calvin & Hobbes, Georgette Heyer's The Grand Sophy, and Terry Pratchett's A Hat Full of Sky.) When I turned on my computer just now, I opened up iTunes and clicked straight to my "Comfort Music" playlist, which is full of music that always makes me feel better. And I started to think about ways to comfort myself, which is always a lot more fun than thinking about all of my manifold ways to make myself anxious. Here's my Comfort List, as of today:

1) Listening to comfort music (Frou Frou, Hayley Westenra, Bach cello suites, Anonymous 4, and--embarrassingly, I know--Jewel's 2nd album)
2) Going to coffee shops, drinking frothy lattes, and eating big crumbly, fruity muffins
3) Watching comfort movies (I re-watched "Moonstruck" this week, my favorite Opera movie ever, which always makes me happy--it's all so over-the-top and silly and fun and good-hearted, and it's All About Opera!)
4) Reading nice reviews of short stories I did get published (and, although I hate to admit this in public, clicking over to SFWA to remind myself that at least 3 people thought well enough of one of my short stories to recommend it for a Nebula, which is one of the coolest things ever, for me--I know they didn't do it just to make me happy, but wow, I light up every time I remember that, and it provides an awful lot of reassurance when I'm feeling scared about my writing abilities)
5) Cuddling Nika
6) Reading novels I've been reading and re-reading since I was a kid (like Robin McKinley's Beauty). There's a special pleasure in re-reading those--not the thrill of discovering a great new book, but something deeper, a wonderful sense of reassurance, familiarity, and welcome, when I sink back into them.

So. That's my comfort list, this week. What about yours?