This morning I experienced the musical equivalent of discovering a twenty in the pocket of a pair of jeans you haven’t worn in months. I found a pretty beat-up looking homemade CD in a bag of things that my sister gave me at the house this weekend. I couldn’t wait to listen to it this morning, hoping for some cheesy old music that we used to love back in our cheesy childhoods. When Kan Kon’s “I Beg Your Pardon” started playing on the headphones, I was fully expecting a morning full of New Order, OMD, Erasure, and perhaps Yazoo to play next. Instead, I discovered everything from Tonic, Dido, and Everything But the Girl to Def Leppard and the Pogues. For some reason, this specific mix absolutely cracks me up. I guess, as my sister, she’s entitled to the same crazy, nonsensical, and completely illogical taste in music, but I really didn’t expect the lineup.

So after listening to the Pogues’ “Tuesday Morning” about a half a dozen times (absolutely kick-ass song, haven’t heard it in ages) I’ve been thinking about songs that I’ve loved in the past, songs that are as familiar as the places I’ve lived, even cars I’ve driven. Songs that have as much to do with who I am as the books I’ve read. Yes, there are some damn cheesy ones, but I still love them. When I come back from the trip I need to get down to the Record Exchange to get back in touch with my inner cheese. I seem to have lost a lot of my old CDs, and am itching to hear songs like Cracker’s “Euro Trash Girl,” Morphine’s “Cure for Pain,” the Soup Dragons’ “Divine Thing,” Erasure’s “Oh L’Amour,” New Order’s “Bizarre Love Triangle,” and a host of others that I’ll know when I see. Oh yeah, OMD’s “Dreamin’” and “If You Leave” must not be forgotten.

Funny. I used to be embarrassed to admit that I liked certain songs or certain bands, and it wasn’t until about two years ago that a discussion with fellow music fans completely changed my mind. We were discussing our “guilty pleasures,” also known as CDs That We Hide When Friends Are Over. As I giggled over my hard-core metal fan friend Dena’s secret stash of the Back Street Boys, an older and wiser party to the conversation made an excellent point. She said, “A true music fan loves all kinds of music.” She made an excellent point, one that I’ve been ruminating upon ever since. Without going in to huge depth, let me just conclude this part of this entry by stating that I’m no longer ashamed to drive through the neighborhood wearing my Social Distortion Beanie, windows down, blaring songs like Billy Joel’s “For The Longest Time,” James Taylor’s “Fire and Rain,” or CCR’s “Have You Ever Seen the Rain?”

That said, I’ll never voluntarily listen to Celine Dion. Sorry.

The weekend was productive, anyway. Worked Friday and Saturday night, made unbelievable amounts of cash. It was almost difficult to believe. I feared there was some big, cosmic mistake. Fortunately, there was not. Yesterday I spent with Jessica, shopping and such. I think her and Jesse are over, she told him to find someplace else to stay on Friday night. They both look like hell, and my heart breaks for them both. Every time I think about the situation I get choked up, so I try not to think about it. There’s the family that you are born in to, and there’s the family that you choose for yourself. They are my family, and it’s crazy to be so upset about the end of their relationship, but I am so sad for them, for our friendships, for their child. I wish this wasn’t happening.

I’m almost ready for the trip. Well, physically anyway. It’ll be strange. Guess I’d better dust off my Moleskine for the first time in over a year. I tried to find a better journal but I haven’t had much luck. They have to have a certain size, a certain heft, the right cut of page and thickness of paper. I’ll know it when I see it.