Everyone I know is in law school. No, seriously. Okay, maybe not everyone but at least half, which really only serves to make me grateful it’s not me.

I can really do without the whole Socratic Method thing, which seems to be built mostly on a foundation of trying to make students cry.

Professor: “You there, in the blue shirt. What year was Smith vs. The State of California decided?...Don’t know? How about Bob vs. His Square Pants?...Still no? Okay, try this. What year did you become such an idiot? And you smell. When did you start to smell? And your mother is ugly. Ha! Take that. Now leave my classroom. Leave it! You’ll never be a lawyer. Never!” (maniacal laughter follows)

But if you survive, you can be awarded honorable mention for your brief and best oral argument like my friend Lynn, who clearly knows exactly what year Bob sued those damn square pants. So yes, this entire blog post was nothing but a ruse to publicly congratulate her. Congratulations!

(Of course, I’m still absurdly grateful it’s not me.)