ahream

Remember Cookie Crisp cereal? Cookie Crisp was awesome. Actual mini chocolate chip cookies that you could pour into your mustard yellow 1970s-era Corel bowl, cover with milk and call it breakfast. It was the ultimate kid coup d’etat. Dessert for breakfast. And as long as you actually drank the milk, you were golden.

(Remember when drinking your milk was the biggest nutritional worry for kids? Of course, that was before cable when you had to tear the kid kicking and screaming off his bike to come in for dinner.)

Today, for breakfast, I had a cereal that the box describes as (I swear I am not making this up) crunchy fiber twigs and soy protein grahams. (You’re jealous, I can tell.)

A college friend of mine had a guinea pig named Sally Tomato. And I have to say, this cereal looks suspiciously like what was left in Sally’s bowl after the daily feeding. Of course, guinea pig leftovers probably taste a little more like alfalfa and a little less like 20-year-old cardboard than this stuff.

I put a banana and a couple of teaspoons of sugar substitute on it. (Remember real sugar?) But, really, who am I kidding? It’s grownup gruel, and no amount of maltodextrin and aspartame* is going to turn it into Cookie Crisp.

The days of Alpha Bits and Coco Puffs are gone. Also gummy bears, pixie sticks and Bubblicious.

And remember when pizza didn’t include artichokes or fire-roasted anything?

Mom: (standing in line at the Pizza Hut take-out counter with my “Super Reader” coupon for a free kid-sized pie) “What do you want on your pizza?”

Eight-year-old me: “Cheese.”

Mom: “Sausage?”

Me: “No. Cheese.”

Mom: “How about olives?”

Me: (looks at her like she has a hearing problem) “Cheese.”

Now, it’s crunchy fiber twigs and soy protein grahams. It’s fat-free raspberry vinaigrette salad dressing and things with capers and Dijon mustard. I eat spinach because it’s good for me. For dinner last night, I had fish for the Omega-3. And I hate fish.

I have undeniably become a grownup. And really, I’m not sure it’s better on this side of the fence. Somebody toss over some Cookie Crisp.

*sweetener ingredients

ahream Dispatches from the City of Angels I'm a mystery writer living in and writing about Los Angeles. You can catch my short story, "Running Venice," in the new anthology LAndmarked for Murder. Look for it in bookstores and on Amazon.com now. In the meantime, feel free to poke around. Over at my website you can find even more blog entries than I could fit here, as well as a few other ramblings. Enjoy and come back often.
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Previous Entry :: Next Entry Read/Post Comments (2) Most Recent Twitters: A 3-foot long alligator was found walking down the middle of the street in Venice Beach this morning. I love L.A. In case you were wondering, it is very difficult to get a hummingbird out of your house. They are irrational and prone to hysterics. L.A. Finds: The Nickel Diner on Main between 5th and 6th is a made-to-look-old, throwback of a place that melds into the old downtown and is, at the same time, part of the renaissance. They serve their burgers medium, their soda in bottles and offer all they can to locals in need. Flickr Updates: The second Thursday of every month is the Downtown Art Walk. The galleries stay open late, the restaurants are packed, bands perform on the streets. God, I love L.A. What I'm Reading: Attack of the Unsinkable Rubber Ducks by Christopher Brookmyre What I Talk About When I Talk About Running by Haruki Murakami Want E-Mail Updates? Click here, type your e-mail address into the first field (for public entries) and receive an e-mail note each time a new blog post goes up. (Photo updates, Twitters and "L.A. Finds" features not included. Those you have to swing by and check yourself.) Absolutely, positively no spam. Promise. Other author blogs: Sue Ann Jaffarian Eric Stone Christa Faust Lipstick Chronicles		2006-02-06 1:28 PM It’s official, I’m a grownup Remember Cookie Crisp cereal? Cookie Crisp was awesome. Actual mini chocolate chip cookies that you could pour into your mustard yellow 1970s-era Corel bowl, cover with milk and call it breakfast. It was the ultimate kid coup d’etat. Dessert for breakfast. And as long as you actually drank the milk, you were golden. (Remember when drinking your milk was the biggest nutritional worry for kids? Of course, that was before cable when you had to tear the kid kicking and screaming off his bike to come in for dinner.) Today, for breakfast, I had a cereal that the box describes as (I swear I am not making this up) crunchy fiber twigs and soy protein grahams. (You’re jealous, I can tell.) A college friend of mine had a guinea pig named Sally Tomato. And I have to say, this cereal looks suspiciously like what was left in Sally’s bowl after the daily feeding. Of course, guinea pig leftovers probably taste a little more like alfalfa and a little less like 20-year-old cardboard than this stuff. I put a banana and a couple of teaspoons of sugar substitute on it. (Remember real sugar?) But, really, who am I kidding? It’s grownup gruel, and no amount of maltodextrin and aspartame* is going to turn it into Cookie Crisp. The days of Alpha Bits and Coco Puffs are gone. Also gummy bears, pixie sticks and Bubblicious. And remember when pizza didn’t include artichokes or fire-roasted anything? Mom: (standing in line at the Pizza Hut take-out counter with my “Super Reader” coupon for a free kid-sized pie) “What do you want on your pizza?” Eight-year-old me: “Cheese.” Mom: “Sausage?” Me: “No. Cheese.” Mom: “How about olives?” Me: (looks at her like she has a hearing problem) “Cheese.” Now, it’s crunchy fiber twigs and soy protein grahams. It’s fat-free raspberry vinaigrette salad dressing and things with capers and Dijon mustard. I eat spinach because it’s good for me. For dinner last night, I had fish for the Omega-3. And I hate fish. I have undeniably become a grownup. And really, I’m not sure it’s better on this side of the fence. Somebody toss over some Cookie Crisp. *sweetener ingredients Read/Post Comments (2) Previous Entry :: Next Entry Back to Top