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And breathe, again
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Home again.

CPN (aka dearest H) appointment at psych hospital first thing in the morning, so just a quickie here.

Still no date for ED's referral for the feeding tube. The care home and the GP are both chasing it up and say it's almost certainly going to be this Monday, but fucking hell. She is taking in some liquid and some food but is still dehydrated so her mental capacity is lower than it will be when she is rehydrated again.

This is the downside of the NHS, especially at the moment when they're (the govt) trying to turn its primary purpose into generating profit rather than health. It will all be free, but sometimes you have to wait. ED is 'urgent' but not as urgent as someone who can't take in any food or drink at all.

Meanwhile, I have completed five of the ten days free ten minute starter sessions on mindfulness that are available here and I am liking it because a) the bloke talks in an ordinary voice, not the kind of insincere, "soothing" tone that sets my teeth on edge b) it's slightly different every day, so I haven't fallen into drifting off due to over-familiarity c) you can have it on the computer or as an app on your phone, so I could do it easily yesterday while away from home d) unlike CDs or youtube, when it's finished there's silence so you can pause rather than leaping up to turn off the next track and e) it makes me feel good. It's not magic - it didn't prevent my melt-down yesterday morning - but it leaves a strong sense of calm for a while and the reports are that this increases over time. We shall see.

Still and all, today I am grateful for: making it there and back without mishap; acupuncture; one of my facebook friends inadvertently giving me a good topic for tomorrow's photo, beginning with X; seeing H tomorrow - woo hoo!


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