hmmmmm. should i be happy or should i be sad....
ok. let us examine the day.
today i went for training. and guess what.
NEWSFLASH: I'M IN THE SCHOOL TEAM.
(refer back to the title of this post just to see how much i expected this)
when i heard it, i totallly coulden believe. like hello. i'm 1.55m. i'm a sprinter. and a damn slow one at that. and now, i'm in school team. as a HURDLER.
see. miracles happen. must be. else there's no other logical explanation for this... i mean...
urg....
i feel:
1) happy. like duh. its like 4 years. at least i get to run for school once...
2) sad. cos i took the chance from someone else and i wish i didnt have to. i wish she was in the team with me.
3) stressed. cos i noe this is the beginning of a long, hard, rocky, bumpy, uphill road all the way to july. usually by this time, i'm just really slacking during training cos i noe i'm not representing school. but now everything is different. everything. now's not the time for me to let go. now's the time for me to "pick up the pace". (sometimes, even the best have to eat our words)

today we did 11 hurdles. like as if 10 wasnt enough of a headache... i think i failed quite miserably. must try harder this training.

things i must do:
1) try to believe that i can hurdle.
2) shall not say the words "cannot" or "suck" right before i do hurdles.
3) shall not say the words "shit" and "crap" when i cross the hurdles.
4) shall try to listen and change whenever ms lim or coach tell me anything.
5) still get good grades. (really cant let this slip. like hello. i'm the greatest mugger/nerd of all time. i must i must try to do well in both areas)

i noe i will probably cry a lot during the next 2 months and there will be times i will feel like death is the only way out again... i just hope i can pull through. like. i really wanted this for a long long time. i dun wanna walk away saying "damn i screwed it up"
i have one shot and i intend to take it, and make it worthwhile.