school starts again tmr. i hate going back to school after breaks.
lessons. people. and promos.
triple yay.

i cannot do lit. i have been trying to squeeze some sense out of the silken tent and scaffolding for like the whole morning. and my microsoft word typing thingie is still blinking at me from the top of a blank Document 1.

this is shit.
i have to say that sept holidays has been very unproductive this year... this time last year, i did all my 8 subjects in 9 days. motivation i suppose. because prelims were coming...

and this year, i have only 5. and i cannot say i have covered anything well enough. i am... feeling undriven i suppose. i have no idea why. maybe... i don't care anymore? maybe i'm reliving sec 2. back then, i didn't do homework, didn't study for tests, barely stayed awake in class... i wasn't exactly happy come to think of it. just that general... life is hopeless and so i'm not going to fight feeling.

the good thing is, once i hit this stage, i kind of just stop caring what people think. usually, i'm really aware. and conscious. but right now... i can tell you that i don't give a shit. i'm just... trying to find a reason to soldier on.

the bottomline: life sucks becuse promos suck. and i wanna die.