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gabriel Love and ferrets and pretending to be a writer. 2003-05-20 5:33 AM Shacking up Previous Entry :: Next Entry Read/Post Comments (2) |
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And now for the random thoughts of an undisciplined mind. I have always had a certain small contempt for people who refer to their live-in sweetheart/partner/fuck buddy as their fiance. If asked when the wedding date was and they had no answer I figured they were shack-up buds and not really engaged at all, though I never said this to the proposed proposee, because that would be rude, even though it was ruder to talk behind their backs, which I, of course, did do. Well, my sweetheart and I were planning to move in together. We were also planning to get married some time in the foggy future, but, without a date set, I did not refer to him as a fiance, but instead as my sweetheart or my boyfriend (though, at 51, he is mostly no longer a boy). We still don't have a wedding date set, but we are shacking up, and I would NOT call him a fiance, given my opinionated opinion, except for another deciding factor which never occurred to me as a factor, nor in my wildest dreams thought would ever happen in our case. (Well, okay, being a chronic daydreamer who sometimes makes stories of the daydreams and sells them, I did daydream on it, but not in any expectation of the dream becoming reality.) The deciding factor, to she who wants something definite, is the ring. Once I got that on Christmas Eve, (and it totally took me by surprise -- rendering me speechless, which is a very rare thing indeed) things began to feel a little different. Still, I sometimes refer to Gregg as husband, when occasion arises to refer to him at all, to the unsuspecting public, such as grocery store and library clerks, whom I do not wish to think I use the term fiance as so many others do. We are shacking up now, and it would be the perfectly okay modern usage of the word "fiance" to call him that, but who knows who else might hold my former (or nearly former) opinion? It sounds affected to me, too Frenchy and mock uppercrust for this peasant girl (though, at 47, I am mostly not a girl), and also a little unreal, since I can hardly believe I have this great guy when I have largley been afflicted with losers of my own demented choosing. I still feel odd saying fiance. I am practicing right now. |
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| :: JOURNAL HOME :: SUBSCRIBE TO THIS JOURNAL :: Click on Kathy Gabriel and read my stories :: 2-in-1 Romance by me (but the back cover's misspelled!. grrrrr.) :: November is National Novel Writing Month! :: The Feel Good Manual - happiness can be learned :: Mugs with the wet ferret :: Fractured Frugal Frieds - the best frugality site around :: The ferrets, and other pics by a talented local (very local) photographer :: Kettins_Bob's journal :: Clarion SF & F writing workshop :: Genevieve's journal (Clarion classmate) :: Phil's website (Clarion classmate) :: Nnedi Okorafor's blog (Clarion classmate) :: Online magnetic poetry :: Dave's interactive html tutorial :: Make a snowflake here - WARNING: Addictive! :: |
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