Eric the Half a Bee
A song of epic genius by Monty Python

A one, two
A one, two, three, four…

(piano intro)

Half a bee, philosophically, must ipso-facto half not be
But half the bee has got to be, visa-vi, its entity…
Do you see?
But can a bee be said to be, or not to be, an entire bee
when half the bee is not a bee due to some ancient injury?

(chorus)

Singing!

A-la-de-de, a-one-two-three
Eric the half-a-bee!
A, B, C, D, E, F, G
Eric the half-a-bee!
Is this a wretched demi-bee
half asleep upon my knee?
Some freak from a menagerie?
No! It’s Eric the half-a-bee!
Fiddley-dum, fiddley-dee
Eric the half-a-bee!
Ho-ho-ho, te-he-he
Eric the half-a-bee!
I love this hive employee
bisected accidentally
one summer afternoon by me
I love him carnally
“He loves him carnally”
…semi-carnally…
The End

(a voice: “Cyril Connelly?)
No, semi-carnally!
(voice: “Oh…”)
(voices, singing quietly: “Cyril Connelly…”)
(whistles)