the strange planet inside my head
McCain/Obama Health Care Proposals Side-by-Side
Mood:
eyeing the wave
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can ya hear me now??
some days, i open this box and have no idea what's gonna come out until i start typing.
i'm proud that i have made an entry every single day (cept for one) since i started. it has helped... well, not to resolve anything, but maybe to clarify feelings or opinions i have held for a long time but never committed to. does that make sense?
still, i think it's too early for a recap.
sometimes i am very disappointed in what i write. i don't have a specific genre or focus... which makes it difficult to market. i have been labeled as "mainstream" but labels confuse me and piss me off. i dont like having to be pigeon-holed into any particular pre-concieved notion; i think a good story (or a good writer) is a good story/writer no matter what genre they tackle. if you can write something that touches people, in whatever way, if you can stir emotion of some kind... that should be enough.
i joined another writer's group. *gasp* it's not that i don't like the one i'm in (I DO I LOVE IT) but i feel the need to stretch, to see what i really can do. i love the people in FWBW... there's so much talent there, but they love me too, and i'm not sure i'm getting the feedback i need in order to improve. they are my biggest cheerleaders and the in-depth crits have been very valuable.... but i need to know if i suck and i'm not sure they can be un-prejudiced. i know the rejections from a certain place that shall remain nameless shook me. i know it might be as simple of a matter as it not being the right material for them, and as far as rejections go they were very polite and yes, maybe even helpful...
faith, faith, faith.... so elusive. i did feel good about this new writing group. i had to send in a piece for an "audition", so i sent In The Blue (with some trepidation... after all, one editor called it "raw and unfocussed" which was the friggin point DUH) and the group approved my application to join. (YAY!) it's a spec-fic group, and they consider me "mainstream". which brings up another point... at FWBW every so often we will detail our favorite books. when i did so, it hit me like a wet towel snapped at a bare ass... all of my most favorite books could be considered spec-fic. however, all my short stories are "mainstream". Dreamcatchers is spec. i think. WTF, i fuckin HATE labels.
so, off i go into the wild blue yonder of speculative fiction to see where this wave will take me. i need the push, the motivation to continue with DC... i honestly think its a great concept and i can execute it... (i think i can i think i can) but i need help and i can't get around THAT concept.
my mother is disappointed in the newest piece... Mutiny. she said it was a good concept but poorly executed... and the crits at FWBW were all positive. three of the people i respect the most had good things to say about it... and it's a little tiny piece, nothing major, why do i stress when mom says shit like that? she wrote a column for a newspaper for about 3 or 4 years, and i just went back and re-read a bunch of them and you know what? THEY WEREN'T THAT GOOD. omg, that's like blasphemy. (gigglesnortin) i shouldn't be so .... uh .... bitchy, i guess but WTF, it wasn't like i was going for the pulitzer fuckin prize with that piece. i can't WAIT to hear the breakdown of why she said what she said. *sigh*. i think the best thing to do is not send her any more work.
you see why i'm so confused? why is it so hard for me to trust my own instincts? because, stupid, that's the nature of the writer. yes, i write for myself first. BUT. what's the point in writing if you don't touch others? this all ties back in to the concept i've discussed before, about every human on the planet wanting someone to hear them. i want someone to hear me. is that so much to ask?
i'm proud that i have made an entry every single day (cept for one) since i started. it has helped... well, not to resolve anything, but maybe to clarify feelings or opinions i have held for a long time but never committed to. does that make sense?
still, i think it's too early for a recap.
sometimes i am very disappointed in what i write. i don't have a specific genre or focus... which makes it difficult to market. i have been labeled as "mainstream" but labels confuse me and piss me off. i dont like having to be pigeon-holed into any particular pre-concieved notion; i think a good story (or a good writer) is a good story/writer no matter what genre they tackle. if you can write something that touches people, in whatever way, if you can stir emotion of some kind... that should be enough.
i joined another writer's group. *gasp* it's not that i don't like the one i'm in (I DO I LOVE IT) but i feel the need to stretch, to see what i really can do. i love the people in FWBW... there's so much talent there, but they love me too, and i'm not sure i'm getting the feedback i need in order to improve. they are my biggest cheerleaders and the in-depth crits have been very valuable.... but i need to know if i suck and i'm not sure they can be un-prejudiced. i know the rejections from a certain place that shall remain nameless shook me. i know it might be as simple of a matter as it not being the right material for them, and as far as rejections go they were very polite and yes, maybe even helpful...
faith, faith, faith.... so elusive. i did feel good about this new writing group. i had to send in a piece for an "audition", so i sent In The Blue (with some trepidation... after all, one editor called it "raw and unfocussed" which was the friggin point DUH) and the group approved my application to join. (YAY!) it's a spec-fic group, and they consider me "mainstream". which brings up another point... at FWBW every so often we will detail our favorite books. when i did so, it hit me like a wet towel snapped at a bare ass... all of my most favorite books could be considered spec-fic. however, all my short stories are "mainstream". Dreamcatchers is spec. i think. WTF, i fuckin HATE labels.
so, off i go into the wild blue yonder of speculative fiction to see where this wave will take me. i need the push, the motivation to continue with DC... i honestly think its a great concept and i can execute it... (i think i can i think i can) but i need help and i can't get around THAT concept.
my mother is disappointed in the newest piece... Mutiny. she said it was a good concept but poorly executed... and the crits at FWBW were all positive. three of the people i respect the most had good things to say about it... and it's a little tiny piece, nothing major, why do i stress when mom says shit like that? she wrote a column for a newspaper for about 3 or 4 years, and i just went back and re-read a bunch of them and you know what? THEY WEREN'T THAT GOOD. omg, that's like blasphemy. (gigglesnortin) i shouldn't be so .... uh .... bitchy, i guess but WTF, it wasn't like i was going for the pulitzer fuckin prize with that piece. i can't WAIT to hear the breakdown of why she said what she said. *sigh*. i think the best thing to do is not send her any more work.
you see why i'm so confused? why is it so hard for me to trust my own instincts? because, stupid, that's the nature of the writer. yes, i write for myself first. BUT. what's the point in writing if you don't touch others? this all ties back in to the concept i've discussed before, about every human on the planet wanting someone to hear them. i want someone to hear me. is that so much to ask?
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