the strange planet inside my head
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letter Three to my Muffin
*author's note: this is a weekly letter to my Muffin, who is baking inside my GC.
Hi Muffin!
Yes, it’s Sunday again already. It’s funny how time can creep by sometimes, and flash by in others. Right now you’re about the size of a raspberry and weigh as much as a paperclip. You’re starting to move around, although your mama can’t feel you yet. They say you’re starting to look human, and even though there’s no outside evidence, you either have ovaries or testes right now.
I’m hoping for ovaries, I feel like it’s ovaries, but it doesn’t really matter as long as you just do your job and grow nice and healthy. When I see you in my dreams, you have ovaries. But dreams are funny like that. It’s hard to tell what’s a foretelling and what’s your heart’s wishes.
I wonder what you dream about, swimming around inside of your mama. I’m sure babies dream, but I wonder if they dream about the life they left behind or of the one that is to come. Yes, I think about weird things like that. We’ll have to chat about it.
We’re going to chat about a lot of things, and I hope you know you can come to me with just about anything. Your mama and auntie and uncle do; I don’t know everything, but I think they feel pretty comfortable telling me the important stuff, and I want you to feel that way too. I’ll never tell if you ask me not to, and I won’t be mad if you tell me the truth.
Honesty. That’s number one. It’s hard to do and hard to hear sometimes, but it’s worth it, Muffin, it really is. Not everyone will be honest with you, but if *you* are honest with them, they know where you stand and most important, *you* know where you stand.
That might not make much sense now, but trust me, it will.
My hope for you is strength. You come from strong stock; your great-great-grandmother was the eldest of a lot of kids (I think as many as seven) and your great-grandmother has seen some sheeeeit, oh yes indeedy. You’ll love her, Muffin. I can’t wait until you meet her. She’s a hoot.
In my last dream about you, we were by the tree overhanging the stream. But this time, I was sitting in the sun and you had little white sandals on your feet, dressed in a pink gingham sundress with matching drawers. So cute. You were walking over to me to show me a rock. It was a lovely rock. “See, Noni?” you said. “See?”
I see the wonder you inspire. I see the love you carry with you, and I see a glimpse of the future. You make me see I have to try harder. These are things I really need to see right now, and I love you very much for helping me to do that.
****
Be easy on mama now, okay? And just because I'm here and you're there doesn't mean that you all (yes, Daddy too) aren't in my heart with every single beat.
See?
<3
Check out TSB for the most legal fun you can have with your clothes on.
Hi Muffin!
Yes, it’s Sunday again already. It’s funny how time can creep by sometimes, and flash by in others. Right now you’re about the size of a raspberry and weigh as much as a paperclip. You’re starting to move around, although your mama can’t feel you yet. They say you’re starting to look human, and even though there’s no outside evidence, you either have ovaries or testes right now.
I’m hoping for ovaries, I feel like it’s ovaries, but it doesn’t really matter as long as you just do your job and grow nice and healthy. When I see you in my dreams, you have ovaries. But dreams are funny like that. It’s hard to tell what’s a foretelling and what’s your heart’s wishes.
I wonder what you dream about, swimming around inside of your mama. I’m sure babies dream, but I wonder if they dream about the life they left behind or of the one that is to come. Yes, I think about weird things like that. We’ll have to chat about it.
We’re going to chat about a lot of things, and I hope you know you can come to me with just about anything. Your mama and auntie and uncle do; I don’t know everything, but I think they feel pretty comfortable telling me the important stuff, and I want you to feel that way too. I’ll never tell if you ask me not to, and I won’t be mad if you tell me the truth.
Honesty. That’s number one. It’s hard to do and hard to hear sometimes, but it’s worth it, Muffin, it really is. Not everyone will be honest with you, but if *you* are honest with them, they know where you stand and most important, *you* know where you stand.
That might not make much sense now, but trust me, it will.
My hope for you is strength. You come from strong stock; your great-great-grandmother was the eldest of a lot of kids (I think as many as seven) and your great-grandmother has seen some sheeeeit, oh yes indeedy. You’ll love her, Muffin. I can’t wait until you meet her. She’s a hoot.
In my last dream about you, we were by the tree overhanging the stream. But this time, I was sitting in the sun and you had little white sandals on your feet, dressed in a pink gingham sundress with matching drawers. So cute. You were walking over to me to show me a rock. It was a lovely rock. “See, Noni?” you said. “See?”
I see the wonder you inspire. I see the love you carry with you, and I see a glimpse of the future. You make me see I have to try harder. These are things I really need to see right now, and I love you very much for helping me to do that.
****
Be easy on mama now, okay? And just because I'm here and you're there doesn't mean that you all (yes, Daddy too) aren't in my heart with every single beat.
See?
<3
Check out TSB for the most legal fun you can have with your clothes on.
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