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i was subjected to sexual harassment training today. i actually sat there and said not one word, although the temptation was great.

okay, so there was this one part where they showed a video clip of an obnoxious idiot coming on to a cocktail waitress. at the end of the clip, the instructor asked, what do you think should happen? i said, guess where that drink would end up?

but that was it. that's all i said. and it was the wrong answer. heh.

well, it's right to me. i understand politically correct, being professional and all that, but put your hands on me without permission, motherfucker, and all bets are off. you'd be lucky to come out of it with a lap full of ice. actually, put your hands on me without express permission, and you'll NEED a lap full of ice, you can take THAT to the bank.

****

i hate classes like that. they bear no resemblance to the real world as i know it.

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here is a special note to people who have been trying to get me on my phone: it's not working properly, and it hasn't worked properly since i dropped it in the move. sometimes it will ring, and sometimes it won't. sometimes it shows i have messages, and sometimes it will hoard my messages until i have ten on there. it's not personal, it's strictly a hardware problem, one i hope to remedy this weekend.

also, i love you, mean it, but i cannot answer my cell phone at work. okay?? again, nothing personal, but it's against the rules, so between the hours of 3-11 on the days i work, I CANNOT ANSWER MY CELL PHONE EVEN IF IT RINGS. also, i would like to point out because of my schedule, i don't sleep the same time normal people do. if you call before 11 in the morning, and the phone actually rings, i may or may not pick it up. again, THIS IS NOTHING PERSONAL. yes, i hate the phone. yes, i do. but i am not blowing anyone off, okay? i'm having technical difficulties.

(so stop bitching.)

****

i hate the phone. i really do. not only do i hate the phone, i hate the feeling of obligation every time it rings. and, okay, the tinge of fear. don't ask, i'm not talking about it.

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so far tonight i've had one invitation to dinner, an emergency visit to a guest's room (much against my better judgement, but it was here on the first floor and had the maintenance dude on the phone with me,) two invites to a going away party at the mexican bar across the street (tempting, that,) a come-on from a Master Sgt. (female, which i politely declined) and it's not even seven o'clock.

is there something in the water??

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hmmm. i think i feel a bit crabby. does it show?

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tonight i'm going to work on my articles, and i just got a new assignment from the folks i still do webwriting for. tomorrow, i'm going to play wiff the lawn mower, clean house, i think whip together some tacos. Gem will be home for good tomorrow night, and that means....I'M OFF SHITTARD DUTY!! hooray!!

okay, maybe i'm not THAT happy. i'll tell you what, honestly, now that the saga is nearing an end...i will not own a dog. the knight (being a mailman) is not a dog person, and the little suckers need a LOT of maintenance and upkeep. but when i get home in the middle of the night and let the Shittard out of his kennel, he is so, so happy to see me. he snuggles and kissies, and i'm eating it up. it just really makes a crappy day fade, in a way that a cat won't do. (notice i didn't say "can't"...there are plenty of nights where Sparky has loved me up, but it's according to HER mood. although i will say i can remember a couple of very bad moments where she came through for me in a Big Way.)

i am very fond of the little Shittard. okay? there, i've admitted it. the possibility for a shorkie has disappeared, as the intended Bride has since been fixed, and i'm not sure if i'm sad about that. i will miss him very much when i've moved on.

speaking of which, there is a possibility peeking around the corner -- but, i'll say no more at this time. the jinx thing, yanno.

****

the people here are also high maintenance, and when they don't get what they want, they are VERY UPTIGHT. holy shit, man. this one guy couldn't get the internet connection to come up on the public computer, and he was WIGGING. he had to print something out, but he was SO wired up he wouldn't even wait until i rebooted the computer. (sometimes, in weather like this, the connection goes in and out. what can i say? i cannot control the weather, i'm strictly a bush-league Goddess.)

then, a gentleman (who does not speak English, no matter what HE thinks) came down who was totally pissed off that someone had their clothes in one of the (free) washers and they hadn't come to get them yet. he wanted me to call the guest and tell him to come and get his clothes out -- but, hel-LO? i don't know who's clothes they are -- i left my crystal ball in my other panties. i sent him to the second floor laundry, and i haven't seen him since.

another gentleman whom i checked in, is extremely irritated we don't provide a hot breakfast. so kill me, okay??

oye. i wonder, mightily, how these people get through life without hurting themselves.

did i ever say i missed the hotel business? i sincerely hope not, but if i did, i take it back, and if i say it again, slap my ass and call me Charlie.

****

four more hours. piece of cake.


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