the strange planet inside my head
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Mood:
we'll save the uglies for later
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the good, the bad...
yesterday sucked hardcore, as the GC said.
last night was bad. very bad. the worst.
****
this morning was not much better. my sister had to put down her beloved Cash, a beagle buddy of 14 years. Momma went with them, because Cash and she had a special bond. i stayed behind (no.sleep.of.any.kind.) and i think it was a brave decision, the right decision, and very good for all of them.
****
funny thing is, i haven't taken any pictures since i've been here, other than two shots of the GC. last night, i took several of Cash and Momma.
****
Momma looks much better today. she had radiation, ate, drank her water and her Boost with no urging. she napped, took her meds, visited, potsied, and is doing her nightly routine with no fussing whatsoever. she is clearer than she's been since i've been here.
(oh, i know what the old woman is up to. see, the trick is to listen to what she DOESN'T say, more than what she does.)
she's sitting in her room, drinking her Boost.
Me: Ma. I see you.
she smiles.
Momma: I know you do.
Me: You're on a mission, aren't you?
Momma: Yep.
(Long silence.)
Me: You're the strongest person I've ever known. Strong or stubborn -- it's a fine line.
she laughed.
****
i think she'll make it to sunday and the shower, and it will be Fabulous. i'm not foolish enough to try to predict anything beyond that. and even that is subject to the Universe's whims. good days are often followed by bad ones.
my money's on the Withered One.
****
when crisis like this happen, we are once again eleven. the problem is, we are more dangerous because we now also carry the baggage of our lives and our choices.
i wrote a very dark entry last night. i didn't know what to do, so i wrote. i've thought long and hard about posting it, and i will at the proper time. i will because the picture is real, the picture is honest, and some things need to be said for those who cannot speak.
****
tired. bone weary. i hope to catch some sleep tonight.
onward. because really, that's the only option.
Stuck for words? Visit WordWebbing, spinning words for any occasion.
Check out TSB for the most legal fun you can have with your clothes on.
last night was bad. very bad. the worst.
****
this morning was not much better. my sister had to put down her beloved Cash, a beagle buddy of 14 years. Momma went with them, because Cash and she had a special bond. i stayed behind (no.sleep.of.any.kind.) and i think it was a brave decision, the right decision, and very good for all of them.
****
funny thing is, i haven't taken any pictures since i've been here, other than two shots of the GC. last night, i took several of Cash and Momma.
****
Momma looks much better today. she had radiation, ate, drank her water and her Boost with no urging. she napped, took her meds, visited, potsied, and is doing her nightly routine with no fussing whatsoever. she is clearer than she's been since i've been here.
(oh, i know what the old woman is up to. see, the trick is to listen to what she DOESN'T say, more than what she does.)
she's sitting in her room, drinking her Boost.
Me: Ma. I see you.
she smiles.
Momma: I know you do.
Me: You're on a mission, aren't you?
Momma: Yep.
(Long silence.)
Me: You're the strongest person I've ever known. Strong or stubborn -- it's a fine line.
she laughed.
****
i think she'll make it to sunday and the shower, and it will be Fabulous. i'm not foolish enough to try to predict anything beyond that. and even that is subject to the Universe's whims. good days are often followed by bad ones.
my money's on the Withered One.
****
when crisis like this happen, we are once again eleven. the problem is, we are more dangerous because we now also carry the baggage of our lives and our choices.
i wrote a very dark entry last night. i didn't know what to do, so i wrote. i've thought long and hard about posting it, and i will at the proper time. i will because the picture is real, the picture is honest, and some things need to be said for those who cannot speak.
****
tired. bone weary. i hope to catch some sleep tonight.
onward. because really, that's the only option.
Stuck for words? Visit WordWebbing, spinning words for any occasion.
Check out TSB for the most legal fun you can have with your clothes on.
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