Scout

Happy!!! Mothers!!! Day!!!

Sun, 9 May 10 15:49:00 UT

I was showing her how to place the round shaping brush under a lock of hair so that she could blow-dry it straight. "When you get to the ends, give it a shot of cold air to set the curl." Suddenly an alarm went off, and I thought, "I didn't have the hair dryer hot enough to set off the fire alarm."

Then I realized the fire alarm really was going off. That thing is so loud it rattled my head. I imagined it was like the IT character in A Wrinkle in Time, pulsating and penetrating inexorably. It hurt.

I picked up the laptop, then went into the living area to find the cats. They were both scared, but dazed enough that I was able to get Molly onto my left shoulder and to get Buck by the scruff and throw him over the other shoulder. Dead weight: 32 pounds. No room for the laptop. No matter.

People slowly came downstairs. One old guy motioned for his wife to come back upstairs, and she refused. He went back in, only to be herded out again by the landlord, who was coming down to check the office and talk to the firefighters.

I took the cats to my car and put them inside. There wasn't any smoke, so I figured they'd be safe. Besides, there wasn't any way I could keep them from running away if I just held them and sat on the curb.

Molly found her way to the most secluded spot she could, which was under the dash. She poked her nose as far into the gas-pedal well as it would go. Buck hung out on the passenger seat. Neither was typically curious. Buck actually shook with fear for a minute or two.

The firefighters checked things out, and we were back in the building in about fifteen minutes. Unfortunately, the alarm went off two more times in the next half hour, and there was no hope of getting the cats out of wherever they were hiding. By this time I had made tea, so I brought that down with me.

I guess someone on the fourth floor had accidentally hit one of the sprinkler heads in their apartment. Not sure how, as they are, of course, in the ceiling, but whatever. There are reports of sodden carpet in the upper hallways, but my apartment isn't wet. I'm on the second floor, and three or four units north of the one in question.

Happy Mothers Day. I hope you were planning on an early morning. I wasn't, but now that I'm up I guess I'll make some Swedish pancakes and get on with potting my plants.

Please help if you feel so moved (or, FCC Douchebaggery Extraordinaire, The Middle Years)

Thu, 6 May 10 11:49:00 UT

The FCC (Federal Communications Commission) may cause the bankruptcy of the company I work for by slashing the reimbursement rate for companies providing communcation services to deaf and hard-of-hearing people.

The FCC proposes a three-tier system, paying nearly the same rate as they do now to very small providers and paying almost half to larger (third-tier) providers. The company I work for is the ONLY third-tier company, with almost 80% of the market.

Imagine if 80% of all operators were out of work. Imagine if 80% of any industry suddenly lost its call processors. You know how it feels to be left on hold for nearly an hour when you call your cell-phone company, right? Now imagine you need to call 911. Imagine how long you would wait if there were 80% fewer 911 dispatchers. Get the picture?

This isn't just about my job, it's about honoring the promise of the Americans with Disabilities Act, which requires that services create "functional equivalency" for D/HH people in all publicly funded areas.

You can help prevent this by sending comments to the FCC between now and May 14th. See the information below about how to do that.

Thanks for considering emailing your concerns to the FCC on behalf of D/HH people, video interpreters, and the several thousand video relay employees who make this system work. Please insert a first paragraph that describes your affiliation with VRS workers and/or the Deaf community, if you so desire.

___________________________________________________
If you wish to express your concern in the form of comments to the FCC, here are instructions, a sample letter and some bullet points you might consider if you would like to submit your own personal comments to the FCC.

Step 1. Go to this link.

Step 2. . Complete the form with your personal information (all fields with an asterisk are required).

Step 3. Enter your comments. (You can type them in Word first and then cut and paste the comment.)

Step 4. Select the "Continue" button.

Step 5. You will be presented with a confirmation page to review your comment before submitting comment. Select the "Confirm" button and your comment will be submitted.

Sample Letter/Email of Support from Concerned Citizens to Be Filed with the FCC:

Honorable Julius Genachowski, Chairman

Commissioner Michael J. Copps

Commissioner Robert M. McDowell

Commissioner Mignon Clyburn

Commissioner Meredith Attwell Baker

Federal Communications Commission

445 Twelfth Street SW

Washington, DC 20554

Re: CG Docket Nos. 03-123 and 10-51

Dear Chairman Genachowski and Commissioners Copps, McDowell, Clyburn, and Baker,

As someone with a strong belief in equal access for disabled people, I am deeply concerned about the FCC's proposed significant reduction in TRS reimbursement rates. It is important that deaf individuals be able to communicate by videophone in American Sign Language using VRS. This life-altering broadband service is a vital link that connects deaf people to the hearing community.

Ensuring that deaf individuals have access to VRS and encouraging improvements in VRS should be a high priority for you as Chairman and Commissioners of the Federal Communications Commission (FCC). The Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) requires the FCC to make available to all deaf individuals nationwide "functionally-equivalent" communications.

You will soon determine the future of VRS. When you set the VRS rate, you will determine whether America makes progress toward the statutory goals of functional equivalence, nationwide access and inclusion â or force deaf users to revert to TTY communications. And, you will determine whether VRS fulfills its potential to drive broadband adoption by the deaf, even in the face of poverty and isolation.

I was deeply disturbed to see the Commission's recent Public Notice on VRS rates. These proposals would put an end to VRS as we know it. One employer has already stated that if these proposed rates are adopted, the company would head into bankruptcy. This would be disastrous for deaf VRS users.

The FCC should be increasing the availability and use of VRS, not cutting back. You should adopt a rate that encourages continuing improvements in VRS technology and continues to improve services levels. Recent developments in VRS are a good example of how the service can be improved, such as enhanced 911 services, 10-digit numbering, a larger and better-trained pool of interpreters and better videophones with an array of enhanced features. Monthly payments for broadband are a big expense for many deaf people, and instead of trying to cut back on VRS, you should be exploring ways to make VRS over broadband more affordable to deaf individuals.

Progress towards functional equivalence will be destroyed if the FCC does not encourage VRS providers to improve VRS and make it more widely available. VRS is a recent and dramatic advancement that benefits those who are deaf, but so much more can be done. It would be tragic if the FCC were to destroy this broadband service that is so vital to the deaf.

Recent reports of fraud in the VRS industry are disturbing to those working for a company that has operated within current FCC guidelines and has worked to maintain the integrity of the VRS fund. The FCC must devote more of its time and energy to focusing on the elimination of fraud.

I urge you to establish a fair and predictable rate for VRS that will encourage VRS providers to invest in improving VRS and reaching more deaf individuals. The law requires it and it is the right thing to do.

Sincerely,

_______________________________________

Sample Bullet Points to Be Filed with the FCC

The rates for VRS proposed by the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) in its April 30 Public Notice would be a disaster for VRS because:

- The rates are so low that it would be the end of VRS as we know it today. No provider would seek to provide VRS at the low rates proposed by the FCC;

- The FCC proposes a low interim VRS rate. A better option would be a multi-year VRS rate, which would allow VRS providers to continue to invest in their offerings for the deaf.

- VRS and the improvements made to it over the years have moved us closer to the goal of âfunction equivalenceâ mandated by the Americans with Disabilities Act. The FCC rate proposal would destroy that progress and move us further from achieving the goals of the ADA;

- This rate proposal would lead at least one company into bankruptcy, leaving deaf customers without the vital VRS service they have come to expect;

- This proposal would almost certainly mean that countless jobs would be in jeopardy in an economy where finding a new job would be extremely difficult, if not impossible.

Really? I'll keep that in mind (weekend stats).

Sun, 11 Apr 10 16:44:00 UT

Another scintillating Scout entry about my weekend. See? You're glad you clicked the link. Maybe.

What My Train Eyes Saw

Fri, 27 Nov 09 17:17:00 UT

Buffleheads
scoters
bald eagles
crows
two men surf fishing at Picnic Point and Lund's Gulch
herons
widgeons
piebald grebes
barrow's goldeneyes
airplane fuselages on train cars, heading north
Cousin Laddie's house
the nude beach at Point Wells (aggressively signed with orange plastic fencing and BNSF no trespassing signs, the bastards)
dog walkers along the Duwamish)
an orange-purple-black sunset over Kingston
Gordie humping Tucker
Uwajimaya
King Street station's clock tower standing proud against a clear blue autn Seattle sky
good friends
the way ahead

Personal Goals for Now until Much Farther/Further Down the Road

Sat, 21 Nov 09 09:12:00 UT

Winter:

- continue to pursue and accept freelance jobs
- provide massage to friends, family and those they refer
- attend the Meetup group activities I have planned
- start the Couch-to-5K program as soon as cleared by the doctor
- build stamina for spring and summer hiking
- become a state-paid caregiver for my dad, giving my mom a break
- use my Happy Light as often as is recommended
- further respect and manifest my Buddha nature
- roller skate once in a while
- tune up my road bike. It's been sitting too long.
- learn to love again

Spring:

- go downhill skiing. It's been way too long.
- hike the lowland hikes
- ride the motorcycle on those rare, clear, cold days
- keep swimming. It's good for my soul. And my squirrels.
- make pilgrimages to Vashon
- ride my bike to one of my jobs unless there's torrential rain

Summer:

- hike, hike, hike.
- take at least two overnight hiking trips.
- if time and money allow, do the Stevens-to-Snoqualmie through hike.
- take motorcycle rides with my Vixen ladies.
- pursue multiple job opportunities
- keep the love alive

Timeshare of Death and Perpetual Indebtedness

Fri, 20 Nov 09 08:56:00 UT

In the late 1980's, my parents bought a timeshare through Worldmark, aka Trendwest, now owned by Wyndham. They figured that we were all young enough to enjoy it, and there were so many nice resorts to choose from.

So far, so good, or so they thought.

They'd use the timeshare a few days a year, mostly going to stay in Leavenworth near my sister's family. Meanwhile, they're paying monthly maintenance fees and paying off the balance of the timeshare ownership.

My dad became pretty much disabled a few years back, and my parents used their time less and less. They were paying money for something they weren't using. My mom thought she'd buy another week's worth of point, so that my brother sister and I could share them once my parents passed on.

Well, she needn't have bothered. We don't want a timeshare. She decided to try to sell it. But guess what? Despite what the timeshare people tell you,

TIMESHARES ARE NOT AN INVESTMENT!

In attempting to sell the timeshare, we found out the following:

- timeshare salespeople will describe their product as an investment. In fact, it has no cash value, and people are not even able to give their timeshares away on Ebay.

- these same folks will also tell you that you have EXCLUSIVE ACCESS to some of the best resorts anywhere. NOT TRUE: unsold weeks or rooms are offered to other travel clubs through clearinghouses, and often for a cheaper price than your week cost you.

- the timeshare, by some vague legal wrangling, is considered heritable property. It goes to your heirs, like a house would, even though it has NO CASH VALUE and is NOT ACTUAL PROPERTY.

- your heirs, once they have the timeshare, are bound by the same rules you were, namely they are saddled with maintenance fees, special assessments, and the like, because the contract you signed was "IN PERPETUITY". Now your heirs also can't get this thing off their hands. (How a third party can be bound by a contract of which they had no knowledge and in which they did not participate is mind-boggling.)

- companies offering to list your timeshare for sale are ripping you off - statistically, close to NO ONE sells their timeshare this way.

- the only way we found to take our name off the "deed" (and I use that word only because the timeshare people do) is to PAY SOMEONE TO TAKE IT OFF YOUR HANDS. That's right. You pay a company to immediately transfer this shithole fake investment out of your name and you walk out of the hotel meeting room NO LONGER A TIMESHARE OWNER. Yeah, the cost was steep, but it will amortize in 26 months (as in, 26 months of maintenance fees equals what we paid these people).

- The benefits of transferring are that you at least get to claim the loss as a capitol loss on your taxes. You can deduct $3000 per year to the value of the "investment", including the amount you paid to the transfer company to relieve your suffering and take the timeshare.

It's been arduous. It's been expensive.

DON'T BUY A TIMESHARE. Ever. Your heirs, at least, will thank you.

The Ugh Factor and Other Observations.

Mon, 16 Nov 09 15:17:00 UT

UGH.
I am still under the weather and damn tired of it. I assume that if I'm able to sleep for 5 to 8 hours in the middle of the day, my body requires this sleep. I am ranging from feeling 75% decent, to feeling about 25% functional, if that. When I'm in the 25% place, the idea of cooking a meal, cleaning the cat box, driving to work, or even composing a thought seem like impossibilities. Damn.

And now for the other observations:

HOME
I have finished setting up the massage room, and as soon as I am well (see 'Ugh' above) I will start offering massage in my home. This will be largely by referral; I am not interested in inviting strangers into my apartment. So, for now I'm planning to work on friends, family, co-workers, and clients referred by these people, as well as by other LMPs in the area.

It's turn-on-the-heat time here in Western WA. While it's not necessarily cold most of the time, the damp and the gloom of late fall require that lights be turned on and heat be used. The fixture in the middle of my living-room ceiling is defective. It's one of those four-lights-and-a-fan thingies, and besides it being ugly as sin, two of the light sockets don't work. I have a mind to ask my landlord if he'll install a new fixture if I purchase it. I have no money, however, so this plan should probably be at least temporarily abandoned. I've got an ugly, serviceable floor lamp with a three-way bulb and three smaller bulbs that does the job fairly well. Light from above would be nice, though, too. I also have the Verilux Happy Light, which I use in the mornings if I'm not scrambling to get out of the house by 5:30am.

FAMILY
My dad has fallen twice since my surgery; the falls were only a day apart. He fell asleep on the toilet in the middle of the night, fell forward and hit his head on the wall corner near the shower. Another trip to the hospital, but no stitches. He's got a goose egg, though. The following day he fell right out of bed. Bless his caregiver, when she heard this story from my mom, she took my Dad commode shopping on their next day together. Now we have a commode snugged right up to Dad's bed, as well as some corner foam to pad that stupid wall corner he keeps hitting. He's damn lucky he's got that hard Swedish head.

My brother availed himself of my assistance as a ghost writer, and now has a wonderful, one-thousand-word essay on the Truman Show as Creation Myth to take to his English class. I know, I'm a teacher, I have no scruples if I essentially write this for him, but he's in vocational school and just needs to get on to the meat and potatoes of auto body and paint. I know he's intelligent, but he hasn't been to college in 20 years, and I couldn't see letting one class trip him up. I'm sure I will be scathingly dealt with by some, but I have reconciled this action with my values. Uneasily, but still. And it's not as if it's an entirely altruistic undertaking: my brother is now my indentured servant. Full obligation will be extracted after I assist with his final term paper, I imagine.

My mother continues her humble march toward sainthood.

Oh yeah, and we paid someone to take the timeshare off our hands. But that's another post, entirely. Don't get me started. I'm supposed to be resting. It is worth the money to know that we are rid of the damn thing.

FRIENDS
Glen will be coming home from deployment in the middle of December. Yay! Let's hope he decides to retire. We'll throw him a big party and thank him for his service, and settle into the idea of having him around for a while.

All thanks are due to my friend Ed, who helped pay to keep my Meetup page going. Ed, you're a good one.

Julie and I are going to see David Wilcox at the Triple Door tomorrow night. I may not be on top of my game, but I can sit in a chair and listen to music. I get to sleep in the next day, anyway. Then just a few more shifts before the weekend.

Thanksgiving will be in Olympia with Heidi and friends. I am excited to just chill out. Maybe I'll take the train down. I really don't feel like driving.

THAT'S ALL FOR NOW
Really, it is. I'm fried and tired and I think I spiked a temp again. Just sitting here. Yay.

Cove Dreaming.

Sat, 7 Nov 09 15:27:00 UT

I sure do miss waking up to this.

How Many Sleeps?

Sun, 1 Nov 09 14:07:00 UT

When my niece Greta was a preschooler, she used to ask her mom "how many sleeps until . . . ?" when she was anticipating an event.

I want to know how many sleeps until I feel well again. Surgery was not so hard on me, and recovery would have been easy had it not been for the panic attacks after my dad fell. I was just coming out of that quagmire (and no giggeddy, I assure you), when I got a cold. It ran the course of a normal cold, and now after about two weeks, I find I just can't shake the last of it. When I go to work, or I work around my apartment, I spike a low-grade fever after exerting myself. It doesn't seem like swine flu, if that's what you're thinking. I think my body just needs longer to heal than it usually would. Makes sense.

I'm enjoying the day we're having; the building across the street has a khaki-colored facade that contrasts so beautifully against the blue sky. I watch clouds roll into the frame of my sash windows, cresting the roofline of the Metron Building, and I absorb all the color I can.

It's a great distraction from the rumpled, too-many-days-old apartment milieu.

And there it is.

Sun, 25 Oct 09 04:25:00 UT

This past summer and fall have been exciting, tumultuous, disappointing, ecstatic, revelatory, and a hundred other things.

I remember a chart on Connon's fridge when he lived in Ballard. His roommate had made a chart of high and low points over recent months. It was both artistic (graphically interesting, hand-lettered), and roller-coasterish. I loved the idea and have at very least thought of making a similar chart at various times.

Written Chart of Elsa's Last Year Or So:

Oct 2008 - abruptly left Vashon for Arlington at parental request. Both good and bad.

Dec 2008 - hired at SVRS, a great job. Good.

March 2009 - passed the National Interpreter Certification exam at the Master Level. Very good.

April 2009 - big raise at work due to NIC-M certification. Super good.

June 2009 - started NW Out and About Meetup Group as a personal motivation to get outdoors more. Neutral - good people, but still personally low motivation.

July 2009 - hiked more, went to Wreck Beach, met a couple of nice folks through the Meetup group. Good.

August 2009 - Waterfall accident. Both good and bad. Good because I saved someone's life; bad because it shook me up emotionally and left me a bit askew.

Sept 2009 - signed purchase and sale agreement for a big farmhouse. Good.
- had breast-reduction surgery. Overall good with some minor inconveniences.

Oct 2009 - hours severely down at work, can't make the bills if it continues - bad.
- had to give up the farmhouse. Timing good, as I found out about work hours prior to closing on the house. Bad, as I will owe some money for things that were going to be rolled into closing.
- while I was recuperating at my parents' house, my dad fell and was tremoring and unresponsive. Bad. Scared the shit out of me and my mom; dad was fine after paramedics took him to the local hospital. Diagnosis later of carotid arterial stenosis. Bad. Very bad.
- had subsequent severe panic attacks. Very bad.
- got the right meds. Very good.
- some meds make me tired. Not so good.
- still recuperating from surgery, very tired often. Neutral - this is how healing sometimes is. But it's torture for the squirrel. The dishes are undone, the apartment generally unkempt, fresh foods spurned in favor of whatever I can pour into a bowl and eat immediately.
- have a cold. Bad. Can't miss work, because I'm already below the hours I need to pay The Man.
- family just up the hill. A mom and dad who love me and take care of me. Very, very good.
- cats enjoying that I'm sleeping all the time and we can snuggle on the bed and watch nature programs narrated by David Attenborough. Very good.

December 2009 - will accept my Red Cross Real Heroes award - very, very, very good.

Apartment Super Friends

Mon, 19 Oct 09 19:31:00 UT

The apartment building is old. Historic, even. There's a plaque out front that says so.

You know what that means, that word, "historic". It means repairs. It means work you'd rather not do, at times least convenient. It means attention.

Our building is suffering from what can be kindly called deferred maintenance. The roof, though "redone" about five years ago, leaks every time it rains hard. (Note to prospective owners of apartment buildings: 106-year-old skylights will leak and you will never, and I mean NEVER, find the source. Rebuild or remove them.) I texted my landlord about it and then did what always gets done: I found the buckets and placed them strategically in my kitchen and out in the common hallway. (Note to bucket-placers: put a washcloth in the bottom so you don't hear the drips.)

The landlord is out of town for a week. So I went to town on my own.

I placed a bulletin board above the mailboxes so the tenants (seven of us, plus a few cats) could communicate with each other. It's already working well. Then I mopped the stairs, all 22 of them, as well as the foyer. After my neighbor Joey took down all of my recycling (the leftovers of moving back into my apartment), I set up my outdoor dining set in the hallway, complete with aloe vera plant and chair pads. There's no reason for anyone to sit there, but it sure looks nice anyway. If I'm going to stay here a while longer, I want things to look nice. Red rag-rug runner, orange chairs and table, green plant, blue ceramic pot. Nice.

Today I bit the bullet and did what we've all been thinking about doing. I got out the vacuum cleaner and its wands, a screwdriver, tin snips, a new dryer hose from the hardware store and some determination and headed to the laundry room.

A two-inch layer of lint had built up behind the dryer. A lesser dusting of lint covered everything else. Time to vacuum up the lint, investigate why the lint wasn't going where it should go, and fix the issue if I could.

Holy moly. My vacuum kept getting clogged, there was so much lint. I moved the dryer and discovered two of the reasons for the lint - the flexible dryer hose had holes in it, and in fact one end was not attached to the dryer. The other end was fitted through a hole in the floor, which I looked into and discovered that the lint was just going to the crawl space above the garage below us. Um, that can't be safe! But guess what? There was, miraculously, a hole in the wall with a 4-inch flange and louvres. A ha! Dryer vent!

I won't go into the various difficulties that I had getting that damn dryer hose clamped onto the L-bend pipe that went into the wall vent. Between Joey, Nate, Annie and me, we had that thing wedged, clamped and duct taped as securely as possible and we're all just crossing our fingers that it will work.

Then Joey and I went to Taco Bell. Sometimes you just gotta say WTF. Even if you're not Curtis Armstrong.

For before-and-after pics, go HERE.

Less is More

Fri, 9 Oct 09 17:41:00 UT

Oy, what a process.

THE GIRLS: The boobies are smaller, though swollen and scarred and taking their time healing. All this is normal. The stitches came out last week, and I see the doctor again at the end of next week. The size turned out perfect, and the nipples look lovely and symmetrical. My surgeon was right - wow, do I sure notice my gut a whole lot more! I've been easily tired, which has been tough because I moved my stuff out of boxes and into the customary and previous locations (with a few improvements). My friend noticed that I'm not chatty, don't have my usual huge appetite, and seem contemplative. Well, it's true. I think a week on Percocet let my lose a whole lot of physical tensions I was holding onto, and now the forced activity restrictions, have just let me spend some quiet time with myself. Truth be told, sometimes that stare is me thinking how much I appreciate whatever I'm thinking of at the moment. Kind of nice to have a vacation from the squirrel.

THE NON-MOVE: So, the house thing. Work hours got cut, and I hate not having a certain margin of safety financially, so the Lazy Kitty Ranch will remain in downtown Cowtown. No move. No B&B, at least not now. This has turned out to be a blessing. I stay closer to my mother and father and brother and sister-in-law, and my rent stays low. I'm still trying to figure out how to wear earplugs but not worry that I won't hear my alarm, since I live on Main Street and within shouting distance of three bars. Maybe an alarm buzzer that vibrates the pillow, I don't know. Still working on that.

THE WORK THING: My company is a good one, but the economic situation has finally come home to roost. Not entirely predictable, though, because the industry is still fairly new and the income stream is hard to predict. Hours are fewer. New revenue-generating ideas are apparently on the horizon. For now, I am working strange hours in order to get as many hours as I can. For instance, I have a day coming up on which I will work 6:30-8:30am, then 11:30am-12:30pm, and finally 4:00-5:00pm. Nuts, huh? But fine with me. Income is good. I'm also doing sub work at local community colleges. Eventually I plan to register with the local interpreting agencies (with my references and certification, I should do just fine) and do some freelance work. I will not starve, I will not get further into debt (I will say that to myself every morning and believe it!), and I will have interpreting adventures.

So, there it is. I'm tired, I'm plugging along, and I'm slowly regaining my perspective while incorporating new ideas about work, life, and living.

Perky-ish

Sun, 27 Sep 09 12:22:00 UT

What day am I on, now? Depends on how I count it, but Tuesday to Sunday is 6 days if you include the Tuesday, which I do.

So, then, Day Six.

I had a low fever last night, so I called the doctor to find out what to do. She said it's nothing to worry about, so close to the surgery. When fever happens a week or two afterward, then she makes sure there isn't an infection at the surgery site. Fevers that follow close on the heels of the procedure, she told me, are most often due to the lungs working hard. WIth the compression garment on, full breaths don't come easy. I imagine my night breathing to be fairly shallow. Dr, Miles recommended walking for improved cardiovascular capacity. Funny, because I was already taking walks with my mom! Walks are good.

Pain meds made it possible to sleep for intervals of almost 4 hours. That's damn cool. I also slept on my right side for part of the night. That's my favorite po-zish: lying on my right side, Tempur-pedic pillow under my head, body pillow starting on top of the other pillow and running down my body and between my knees. For post-op comfort I am also placing a pillow between my left arm and my torso. Just keeps the shoulder neutral.

My friend Juile came by to visit last night - Thanks Julz! I wasn't much company, I'm sure, given my pain and the random words that seem to come out of my mouth when I'm on meds. I hope I was at least marginally hospitable.

Things still itch like hell. I'm also getting some burning sensations at the sutures, but mostly just intense itching. My underarm area is swollen from lipo, as is my upper abdominal area. To be expected. But I sure would like to know what I'll eventually look like. Another worthy lesson in patience.

If I can manage the day without painkillers, I will be able to drive in a few days. I've got another three weeks off and I'd like to visit friends. Might as well use this time for relaxing and catching up, right?

My friend is coming over with some huckleberry muffins. That just sounds lovely.

Amnesiac Diary

Sat, 26 Sep 09 02:06:00 UT

Day Five. I have pockets of motivation separated by long stretches of sleeping and waking.

Percocet seems to work like an amnesiac for me, keeping me in the moment. It's totally necessary that I take it (last night's pain fest was case in point). I can be typing away at this, and suddenly startle my self from a deep sleep to realize I hadn't been to bed at allaooallajjjljjljjjjaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

see? I just then fell asleep at the keyboard.

I sleep for a while, then rouse, walk about the house, nosh a bit, then back tsssssssssssss

to bed. I used to be able to write well from my bed, Right now, I can track about a half a sentence here before I startle and find long, nonsensical strings sdssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

Okay, that's it. Clearly, the meds are not going to allow anything like focus.

Have a good night, and say hello if you see me online later. :-) I'm lazykitty on meebo, and otherwise use lazykittyranch@yahoo.com.

Day 4, oy vey (sorry for the HTML chaff.)

Fri, 25 Sep 09 07:40:00 UT

Well, I'm fine. I'm still a little freaked out by the idea of a seroma, which seems to be getting slightly larger. I went from 8pm until almost 8am without any pain meds, just to see how that felt, and let's just say "if ya got 'em, use 'em." Meds, that is . I also took off the scopolamine patch, but boy howdy, was it clear that I needed that, because I became queasy within an hour of removing it.

If you've had this surgery done, tell me: did the swelling get worse before it got better? In the hospital I was getting an anti-inflammatory, but not so now that I'm home. Perhaps that's one explanation for the increased (and mighty) turgidity I'm experiencing. I have transient pain under my clavicle and a dull ache under my arm. The doctor said don't worry, but I could come in today if it seemed like I couldn't get through the weekend without being checked. I'll see what I think at 9am.

I itch like crazy, not so much at the stitches, but globally under the Tegaderm bandaging. It's like sticky Saran Wrap and goes over all the cotton gauze. It doesn't actually touch the wounds.

I am so looking forward to my massage today.