Reading: Starcombing by Dave Langford
Music: trad Irish
TV/Movie: The Jose Chung episode of Millennium
Link o' the Day: The Red Green Show page at CBC Television



Welcome to this Friday's mailbag.

First up is this undated letter which comes addressed to a Philip Kilkenny of Ohio. It arrived in a yellow business envelope with an uncanceled airmail stamp...

Dear Mr. Kilkelly,

We are pleased to report that your nephew has made some wonderful progress over the past few weeks. Through intense rounds of therapy, both group and one-on-one, he has come to accept that he is not Caesar, Napoleon, nor Lincoln. While still nervous and tense while in the presence of the color purple and hamsters, your nephew no longer suffers a catatonic state. His once too-frequent screams of "Is that you, Bailey?" in the middle of the night have reduced, instead, to quite Latin mumblings. Most importantly, the other patients have become more at ease in your nephew's presence and no longer flee in tears.

All very positive changes, as I'm sure you'll agree.

He does still refer to everyone as Betty, and he still blinks far too rapidly than one would deem healthy, but a consulting eye specialist assures us that it is not for physical reasons.

So obviously there is still some work ahead of us before we would feel confident in releasing your nephew back into the business world.

Actually, to be honest, we fear that the entire process may take a little longer than initially anticipated. Yes, there has been progress, but a few new quirks have appeared since your last visit to the sanitarium. Your nephew refuses to eat anything not stuffed into a sausage casing. Three times in the last week we have removed up to a dozen frogs from his bedding. And, perhaps most alarming, he has been asking to speak to the press.

In regards to your upcoming scheduled visit, we still recommend you arrived attired and made up, as last time, as Blind Pew from Treasure Island.

Our methods may seem unusual, but they eventually get results, so our two hundred-plus year history demonstrates.

Thank you, and we look forward to your visit.

Dr. Onan Gupta
Serenity Isle Sanitarium
Bermuda

Enclosed in the letter is a map of a beach with two trees circled in red. What one has to do with the other is a mystery.

This week there are two missives on rag paper with crimson ink. In what order they are to be read is unclear as neither have dates nor any other clues to indicate order of delivery.

First:

Dear sirs,

Under the black oak, a man swings above fresh mandrake root.

All is now well and the status quo has been restored.

(unsigned)

Next:

Dear sirs,

Henry (not his real name) claims to have seen the signal, but at the wrong window, in the wrong color, and at the wrong frequency. Normally we would not seek a clarification--instead interpreting this as no signal of any sort, but given recent events, confusions, misunderstandings, and other security concerns, we feel clarification of signals is in order.

Just to make sure we're all on the same page, as it were.

We'll appreciate your patience if you'll appreciate ours.

The time grows near.

(unsigned)

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The old work schedule has a little bit of a hiccup this week as some deadlines got shifted around, but we're achieving equilibrium of sorts and I should be able to finish up this week on decent footing. Three books have all had completed revisions turned in. We have a new cover for the Van Alexander book which, it has been revealed unto me, is cheerfully approved by the author. Today is going to be spent mostly on the SFWA Bulletin and working over some photos.



Project Big Move continues as I've scored some decent boxes from the local Petco and Walgreens. I've managed to keep up a daily purge of two extra large contractor bags a day of stuff we are not moving with. Not just trash, but stuff that has not been looked at or moved in over three years and that has no sentimental value. I'm pulling some old books aside to give to others.

Progress. It's all a careful planning as I intend to make sure my work schedule remains uninterrupted during the move next month.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-



Today's link takes you to The Red Green Show page at CBC Television. Check out Harold's photo gallery, some video clips from the 15th, final season, and schedules and links.

This is one of my most favorite shows ever. For those in the US, check out your local public television station listings. Or get the DVDs. You won't be sorry.

Cheers!