I lay on dirty sheets

in a dirty apartment

I have no idea what I am doing here.

He welcomes my inane presence.

Everything here feels so dirty.

I empty my dirty thoughts onto his lap

and appraise my situation.

We have a forced fuck

on these same dirty sheets.

Something about it purifies me.

I am in slow motion

I breathe deep

and inhale dirty cigarette smoke.

My blue eyes

look so much darker here.

We watch dirty movies and read dirty books

I am sanitized

I am freeing myself

from the shackles of sanctity here.

With every piercing touched

every dreadlock grasped

I peel away another layer

of my filthy life.

The blood drains clear

out of my body

Through chaos

I acheive peace.