Brainsalad
The frightening consequences of electroshock therapy

I'm a middle aged government attorney living in a rural section of the northeast U.S. I'm unmarried and come from a very large family. When not preoccupied with family and my job, I read enormous amounts, toy with evolutionary theory, and scratch various parts on my body.

This journal is filled with an enormous number of half-truths and outright lies, including this sentence.

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conversations with 3 of 12

Took my older brother out to dinner to celebrate his 49th birthday.

He's very open about his delusions. Around Halloween, he kept seeing people's faces transform. He was in the hospital and a woman walked into his room. At first her face was like Jason from Friday the 13th, then it turned into herself. He was at church when one girl just suddenly turned into a completely different person. Sometimes when he is reading something, the thing he is reading will start happening in real life. That's harder for him to explain. He likes to read the Bible, but the priest tells him not to read the book of Revelations, because it would be easier for him to get confused.

3 of 12's best friends have died within the past few years. He gets kind of lonely. He was thinking about joining the Knights of Columbus, but they wanted his social security number and he got paranoid about it.

3 of 12 collects CDs and records, but most of the places that sell those things are shutting down. The town he lives in is a college town, and most of the students get their music from the internet now. 3 of 12 doesn't have an internet connection. So mainly he goes to Walmart and K-mart to get music. There was one place he used to order a lot of music at but the guy who ran it is in prison now for downloading child pornography. That guy owes him over $300.00 in music he ordered, but since the guy went to prison he'll never see it now.

3 of 12 sort of has a girlfriend. She only lets him see her once a week. She's a bit slow and she doesn't work, but when he asks to see her, she usually says she is too busy. They have a platonic relationship, but he thinks some day he might marry her.

We went to the Chinese buffet. It was Friday and 3 of 12 doesn't eat meat on Fridays (it's a Catholic tradition during Lent and some people practice it all year), but he found enough to eat. 3 of 12 is about 5'7" and he weighs about 140. I'm 6' and I weigh about 220. I'm trying to lose weight so it was my first decent meal of the day. I had a client last week who was 6'1" and weighed 125 lbs. African woman with a very slight frame. My stomach hurt after we finished our meal.

Anyway, I'm going hiking in the Catskills today. Temperatures should reach the 50s, which is perfect hiking weather. There may be snow and ice in the higher elevations though because of the Noreaster that went through. The two big storms that have passed through in the last couple of weeks missed us, but the Catskills are a couple hours east and south. I'll bring a headlamp because of the short days and some microspikes for my boots in case we hit some ice. We're only going 9 miles with 1400 feet of elevation change. 13 miles is about my limit because of the problems with my feet. I've done more than 3000 feet of elevation change in the past year. I don't get a lot of exercise outside of these hikes though.


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