I'm not very consistent in my bloggery, I notice. Some days go by with no word, then I go bonkers. Apologies, that's how it is when you've got the chronic pain thing. And I'd space 'em out more, but well, instant gratification is fun! And I might forget.

So, according to sources (ok, I googled) it was Arthur Coren, "famed British humorist" (not to moi, but I'm clearly not up on famed British humorists, what can I say?) who said that in order to reach the public with a book, you needed a cover that featured golf, cats or Nazis. He then went and proved it by publishing GOLFING FOR CATS. Go look, you'll find it on Amazon. Sans cover - the little jerks - cover had a golfing cat and a swastika.

Last night, Stu and I were, er, improving on it. I offered "Feng Shui Golfing for Cats". Stu said "for Dummies" I said "the diet" and he suggested making it one of those highly successful "chicken soup books". So it looks like my first anthology will end up being "The Feng Shui Golfing for Cats Chicken Soup Diet for Dummies." OR maybe the title of the first CD by the Sad Anoraks. That's a virtual band; no music yet, but GREAT merchandising ideas. I'll blog about us separately. It's ALL Shaz Wheeler's fault; and what's great is that she doesn't read blogs so I can say whatever I want to about her. Mwhahahahahahahahaha!

Balancing this off, it's been that sort of week - the fly-off-the-handle and have hysterics sort of week . I lost it this week big time; I do that every so often because I feel frustrated and angry and limited and helpless and useless. Maybe we all do that. I dunno. Mine comes from the pain crap and it kicked in big time Sunday and Monday. Hands didn't work. Back limited me. Brain wasn't too functional. I couldn't find a simple thing I needed and wanted to find. No huge hairy deal; I could get another one but it was straw/camel's back, you know the drill. I should have been able to find it, did not want to fill it out again (the hand thing), felt stupid and wondered how the heck I managed to even get dressed and feed myself. That one. And it's not the meds, because I function fairly well normally on the 30-40 mg of hydrocodone I take every day (that's Vicodin, folks. Yummee).

So there was my loud gagging noise yesterday at an ad. I swear, one reason I'd be SO good on "Jeopardy!" is not because I ever played video games, but because my hair-trigger reaction to television ads is to hit "mute" SO fast…but well, our mute button has died and Stu is less intolerant of the damn things than I am so yesterday, I heard the music for an ad and got really REALLY sickened. I know all of "my" cultural references are up for grabs. I know that the music of "my generation" has been pre-empted by anyone and everyone to sell crap. It doesn't make it any more tolerable. But, excuse me here, holy HELL and shit. Using Jefferson Airplane's "Volunteers of America" to sell e-trade mutual funds or whatever the hell they were selling???? And ending the ad "power to the people"????

When after 9/11, some alleged pundits talked about the "end of irony", I really really did not understand that. I think I just got it. Really fuckin funny guys. Dear GODS.

I'm SO glad about Cornelia's book, or this week really woulda kicked off with me wanting to hurt a puppy. As it is, between that and today's mail, which included (swoon) the upcoming Laurie King, I am beginning to believe that I'll make it. Drugs anyone?

So, any suggestions for book/album two or additions to this simply perfect marketing tool?