...nothing here is promised, not one day... Lin-Manuel Miranda

I'm from Seattle, Home of Jones Soda
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I’m sure we all deal with peoples’ ideas of our city, our hometown. And what they know, or think they know isn’t always the really groovy stuff. If you live somewhere big and well known, there will always be people who think you always GO to those restaurants or you know all the players on the sports team when, in fact, you might not exactly care. Or they know stuff from 20 years ago and that’s not what it’s about at ALL any more.

Even worse is when you know it’s not the case but, say, the small-minded newspapers in your city write stories as if it’s 30 years ago and nothing’s changed. Case in point here in Seattle is that in 15 years, every Boeing layoff story seems to be front page Oh My God We’re All Gonna DIE news, whereas the story the following week, about 4 new contracts go into the business section or on page 6. And of course, the stories seem to be written as if this is still a one-horse town, as if Boeing is still the ONLY industry. Never mind the music scene, Microsquish, the tourism industry, fishing, the arts.

And I bet you all can point to similar annoyances; the equivalent of the folks who make jokes about the weather (rain? What, here?), or point to something that took place 10 years ago as if that’s the only thing interesting that ever occurred in your city (Cobain died over ten years ago, can we move on please?), or the true but tiresome jokes (yes, really there are a lot of coffee places it’s true, I agree, can we move ON please?) whatever.

So it takes a true wonderful story to make me say “it makes a goil proud to be a Seattlite”. This one comes courtesy of my good friend, the wonderful Shira Rozan who forwarded me email about Jones Soda’s holiday gift packs for 2005.

Do you know Jones Soda? They’re a Seattle-based business. I admit to never having tried a single bottle but they are a treat. They’re the soda company that puts weird colored sodas in glass bottles with weird black and white photos (mostly) on the labels. In fact, ALL the labels are from photos sent in by individuals. They’re rather goofy and appealing and sort of cult-ish and good corporate citizens it seems. They have a really appealing organic line, and some really bad punny sodas (D’Peach mode? Berry White? Bohemian Raspberry – ouch)

And then there’s the holiday packs. They had them last year – I remember reading about this – and they are intended as fundraisers. 2004’s holiday pack raised over $28 thou for Toys for Tots and in Canada they raised money for Covenant House. This year it’s St. Jude’s Hospital and Toys for Tots again. So I offer, for you, er, amusement, the Jones Soda holiday packs for 2005. Remember, these are packs of sodas. That’s liquid carbonated beverages.

The National Pack which can be found at your local Target Store contains
Brussels Sprout with Prosciutto, Cranberry Sauce, Turkey & Gravy, Wild Herb Stuffing, and Pumpkin Pie. It comes with a serving spoon (well, hell, what did you expect, that we’re savages?) moistened towelette, and a wine list.

The Regional Pack consists of Broccoli Casserole, Smoked Salmon pate, Turkey & gravy, Corn on the co and pecan pie. Spoon and towelette are included but for some reason, NO wine list. Hmph. apparently we're expect to provide one of our own fine microbrew beers, or perhaps an espresso. Available, it seems in lots of Cost Plus Stores (we’re guessing in the exotic imported foods section)

Yes, I said Broccoli Casserole soda. And Wild Herb Stuffing Soda. And heh, heh,, I can't say it. Yeah, so? Is there a problem here?

Go check, you don’t believe me. You do, don’t you? You don’t think I’d make this UP, do you?

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