Introductory caveat: I am not condemning the mother, because, as a mom myself, I know that it's a "learn as you go" type of gig, and I've screwed up plenty myself.
At the same time, I think it important to point out why I disagree with how she handled the situation.

*****

A lot of my friends have been linking to this story about a mom whose five year old son dressed up as Daphne from Scooby Doo for Halloween. All the comments I've seen have praised the mother for standing up for her son against those evil, prejudiced people who said he shouldn't be dressed like that.

But that's not the story I saw.

When I read her account of what happened, I saw a little boy who was scared, and I saw a mom who blew off his concerns because She Knew Better.

Here's the thing: even if she had been right that no one would make fun of a little kid in a Halloween costume, she still told her kid that his feelings and his fears didn't matter.

My scenario would have gone like this:

• Sit down with the child.
  
• Ask him what he was afraid of.
  
• Reassure that he is wonderful and creative and it doesn't matter what other people think.
  
• Reassure him that you will be there with him and he isn't alone.
  
• Give him some ideas for what to say to people if they are mean or say he shouldn't be dressed like that, then roleplay until he feels more confident. (I like a story I read a few years back about a mom whose little boy wanted to wear a pink sundress to school; after this sort of roleplay, he showed up in the dress, marched straight up to the teacher and declared, "I'm wearing a pretty dress today, and no one can make fun of me!")

As it is, not only was the son unprepared for the negativity, but his mother had lied to him.

No wonder his mom wrote such a vehement diatribe against Those Evil Judgmental Women.

She felt guilty.