A "G-Rated Journal" That Even My Mother Can Read (because she does!)
Effervescence is a state of mind. It's about choosing to bring sunshine to the day.
Every person I meet matters.
If it's written down, I know it (If it's not written down, I don't know it)
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Daddy-do and me, 2010
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2006-03-01 7:20 PM
Tue Feb 28 - I know in my head that I shouldn't weigh myself every day. But I just can't help that I really want to know. Now, on the good side of this discussion, yesterday's number *was* a little bit aberrational, so I felt good. But after years of bulimia, what usually astonishes me is the ability to walk away from the old "tapes in my head." You know, those thoughts that bounce around and seem to have a life of their own? It's like beating down the beasts, to repeat new lines and make them my own. For example, today I had two bites of something and thought to myself "two bites is better than zero, and two bites is better than twenty." On Sunday I'd been chatting with someone who went on and on about how they "can't stop" eating something. I remember being like that, and I know that you can decide to stop if you want it bad enough. And I really actually want it bad enough now. And eating nothing is not the only choice, you can eat *anything* you want, you just have to decide to stop eating after a smaller portion.
Wed Mar 1 - Yesterday was completely wiped out by a giant project at work. Somewhere around 11:00 pm in the office, I started daydreaming about catching a nap and setting an alarm to get up at midnight (you have to refresh the motion-detector alarms at my building, every 2 hours, starting at 10 pm), and I realized it was time to drive home. But I'm happy to say the project was completed today, only 1 day over deadline, but the next step takes two days to finish and so my boss was perfectly happy with how I handed off 7 of 11 parts late last night and finished the last 4 parts today since the other guy couldn't have finished all 11 in one day either. So no one was waiting for my work.
Anyways, I spent a little bit of time organizing (read: cleaning!) my desk and bookbag this evening, and now I'm headed home to finish bills and items I need to put in the mail, then maybe go to sleep at a reasonable hour.
Tomorrow I get to drive up to my shire meeting and then come home and put up a guest bed for Dayle, who'll come over and crash after a Styx concert. I don't think I have much to do on Friday, and then Saturday it's off to Vegas for my step-brother's wedding. Before I get there, I'm going to take a short side trip to the M&M's World Store (next to the MGM Grand) to buy some specialized M&Ms for a co-worker. I'm actually really excited about the little side trip! How cool! A whole store for M&M's!
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Today's Blessing That I'm Thankful For: Sanity. The ability to decide to walk away from insanity choices in life.
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Weight Loss This Week:
Tue 2/28 - 14.2 lbs (down -1.0 from Mon)
Wed 3/1 - 11.6 lbs (up +2.6 from Tue) This was disappointing, and begs the point that you're not supposed to step on the scale every day. Strange, after what I jotted in my journal on Tuesday. *sigh*
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