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Fair Warning

Okay, ladies and gentlemen, it's time for a reality check.

If you decided to get drunk in my presence, and then decided that you want to get into your car and drive home, I will take your keys. If you persist in your effort to get your keys from me, one of two things is going to happen. One, I'm going to beat the shit out of you and let you deal with it in the morning. Two, I'm going to call the police.

No one has the right to threaten the lives of others by getting behind the wheel while they are intoxicated. Just the fact that you would even think about it puts you into a category of human slime that I don't want to call friend.

If you threaten to kill yourself, or threaten yourself with harm, once again, I will call the police. I will make sure that you spend the night in the e-room while counselors pick your brain and decide whether or not you should be admitted for psychological observation.

And you know what? I'll go home happy, a little song on my lips and a little dance in my step. I don't care who you are. I don't care if you are my best friend. I don't care if you're the fucking Pope. You'll be delivering Mass from a hospital room while strapped down to a table. If you try to give me guilt, I will laugh in your face. If you try to make me sympathize with your situation, I will call you an idiot and then laugh in your face.

Everyone deserves a certain level of compassion. Everyone deserves a certain level of help, understanding and tolerance. The moment you threaten the lives of innocent people or yourself, you pass that certain level.

So, dry up, regain what remaining, functioning brain cells are left inside that vacuous little head of yours, and then beg me for forgiveness while you shower me with thanks.

Then, and then only maybe, you get a little of my respect back.

Idiocy not tolerated here.

Oh, and if you don't believe me, I'll send you to someone who can verify my claims. He'll be able to tell you himself as soon as they release him from the hospital.

If you don't care enough about the innocent lives you may be hurting by getting behind that wheel, then I won't care about you.

Enough said.

Joseph Haines, signing off from The Edge of The Abyss.

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