Not to set feminism back a zillion years, but I love big men. From animated lummoxes like Marv from Sin City and Brock Samson, to towering leading men (Jeff Goldblum, Vincent Price), to portly artists (Diego Rivera, Oscar Wilde), there is just something about a tall man that I can’t resist. I know that the object of tv and movie women’s desires are these pretty, diminutive, metrosexual man boys in their boxerbriefs, but I’m finding out that these guys just don’t work for me. While its nice to be face to face with a guy and share clothes with him, a certain comfort (which is actually sort of psychologically uncomfortable) exists with a larger guy, knowing that he can pick you up, feet dangling, for a kiss or a sloppy dance. A great writer I know also pointed out the charm of having a gal who only comes up to his clavicle, so it’s not just me.

This dynamic apparently works for same sexes too. In thinking about this, I found www.tallmentogether.com, a gay website for tall guys or for guys looking for tall guys. Even aside from the sexual aspect, think of one of my top 5 films of all time “The Imposters”. The big guy and little guy chemistry just makes that one for me. And the beauty of Maria de Medieros and Uma Thurman dancing together in “Henry & June” is absolutely magical.

It has nothing to do with toughness or ability to intimidate, nor is it the large wiener factor. I don’t know if its some primal imprint of virility on my brain (I’m a big believer of collective unconscious) or a Freudian security blanket, there is something decidedly more masculine about a taller man.

Those tall crushes and boyfriends that I’ve had (you know who you are) have all been pretty amazing (albeit weird) in their own ways. Physical opposites are visually fascinating to me, though according to Psychology Today, “Recent improvements in diet are making everyone taller, says Dunbar, and bodies that are too tall will eventually become misaligned, leading women to seek shorter, more symmetrical men. Still, evolution is a slow process--so short men seeking justice may be in for a long wait.” I’m happily unevolved.

I’m sure part of this comes from the fact that I haven’t ever found the fortune teller machine that grants wishes. Though, I’d only like to be tall for like a week, just to see what it’s like. I’m sure being called Stretch loses its charm just as quickly as being called Shorty, and, honestly, I can only roll my eyes so much in a lifetime.