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Making Decisions
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My friends and family are pretty well trained. Most of them don't even bat an eyelash when I get on a roll. They've learned that resistance is futile, and besides, they say it's usually quite entertaining to see me in action. In a split second, I can decide what to do, when we'll do it and whose cage we will rattle. Sometime, though, they are hard-pressed to keep a straight face. Me, too. They say they never know what I might say or do.

I don't see my decisions and actions as so random, like bolts from the blue. Many times, it's a case of acting on preferences or priorities that I established long ago. Lunch out? Great! Let's go. This weekend in Santa Barbara? Why not? We can afford a tank of gas and if all the places are full, we'll sleep in the car. I'm packed in an instant (underwear, jeans, tee shirts) and ready to go while everyone else is spinning like a top from the whirlwind of decisions or dithering over heaven-knows-what.

More complex decisions take longer, of course. But usually I have seen the crisis on the horizon, have done my homework, and am ready to leap into the breach, dear friends, with actions and words ready for deployment. Those who say I "flip" around and "scatter" my activities, just don't know about the prior research and evaluation. I may blather on about inconsequentialities, but I ponder in silence about important milestones.

If I have trouble making a simple decision, it's a clear sign that I am exhausted to the point of collapse or overwhelmed by stressful events. I have a straightforward pre-plan for this situation, too: if there are two reasons to do a thing, do it. If it truly doesn't matter what you choose, as for instance a menu item, close your eyes and point. (Once the decision is made, it becomes instantly clear if it's something I really didn't want and I can re-choose.)

These makeshift techniques for trivial decisions (What shall I wear? What shall we have for dinner? Which movie to watch?) work most times, even when I am totally spent. My true friends know if I can't even do these simple decisions, I'm truly in need of help and they just make them for me. There is nothing more profoundly supportive than a friend who will stand by you when everything else has crashed on your head and you're too tired to cope.

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