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Coping With Stress
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People often get together with a friend and vent about their daily stresses, gripes, and complaints. The theory is that it's helpful to blow off steam and a little mutual release from the pressure really can clear the air. If you think about it, though, it happens daily and is often one-sided--they vent, you listen.

Some people, perfectionists, find that venting seems to increase their stress level, rather than reducing it. A perfectionist faces the unpleasant reality of having to confront small failures, setbacks, lack of confidence and it brings them down even more.

Denial, withdrawal, and self-blame make people feel worse rather than better. Feeling worse leads to poor coping ability.

A perfectionist tends to feel dissatisfied with outcomes, no matter what he achieves and small problems are magnified into failures.

Venting keeps arousal levels high, negative thoughts active, and prevents reframing in a more positive way. It is actually a form of aggression, based on continuing angry feelings.

Better coping strategies? Acceptance, humor, and pursuit of the positive possibilities.

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