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My Inbox Overfloweth
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Having a busy day yesterday meant that I didn't spend much time (read: none at all) time at the computer. Nothing like a day away to make me realize just how many emails I get per day, read, answer or delete or in some other way deal with. Wow!

The morning was taken with listening to a friend vent. Unfortunately, for this person, venting is not a calming, purging process, but a winding-up-into-a-snit-fit process. I couldn't do much more than listen and try to be the voice of reason, while carefully tiptoeing through a minefield of attitude and opinion.

This is what friends are for, I think. To listen, to be present to what a friend needs to say or cry about or whatever is happening. I am, however, not a therapist, and I don't know how to extricate myself without seeming to abandon the other person. When I tried to draw a conclusion and leave the table, my exit drew an accusation that I was being passive aggressive. So I felt obligated to continue to be present until finally the spate of words exhausted itself, its source and me.

I really like my friend and empathize with the feelings, but the intense level of emotionality exhausts my empathy capabilities (not very good at protecting my own feelings), leaving me drained and resentful. I'm still feeling edgy and tired this morning.

Then, midday, I had to go to the VA to attend the quarterly care review for my husband. Another highly stressful and emotional situation. I would have cancelled, but I had promised. It wasn't as bad as I feared, and I returned home as soon as I could.

Then, after dinner, I had to attend a meeting of the Board of Trustees, of which I am a member. No getting out of it. My friend exploded at the Board meeting, and I, knowing what was coming next and that it would be highly offensive, cruel, and unnecessary, intervened, cutting off the speaker and called for a motion/vote.

I know I hurt some feelings in the process and I seldom speak up, but in the long run it was to avoid a huge schism and angry feelings that might not heal. The toll on me was severe (too darned empathetic), and I'm feeling sad and shaky this morning.

However, I will be just fine. I always bounce back and recover, resilient no matter what life throws at me. It's an innate quality for which I am profoundly grateful; it probably preserves my sanity.

So now I'm off to wrestle with the inbox. I wonder how much of it I can just delete...all the news stories, certainly, and the reminders of sales, the offers for viagra, and who knows what else.

Onward, excelsior! I shoot my arrow into the heavens.

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