The dogs have been strangely subdued these past couple of evenings. Is their behavior due to my having gaffled them? No, I have never done this and never will.

Well then, is their melancholy due to the absence of Mrs The Fyd? I believe so. And what is the cause of her stubborn refusal to appear? Has criticism of her baked ziti so enervated her as to cause her to Pack A Bag And Go Home To Mother? Not at all; unfair words for her baked ziti make her lock herself in the bathroom and cry like a drunken six year old.

Since such harsh words for that dish have never left my mouth, our bathrooms remain unoccupied by bibulous be-bottled babies. No; Mrs The Fyd has gone to visit family and friends in a flatter and more middler part of this country. Leaving me to cater to four cats, two dogs, and thirty two fish. No baked ziti for them!