Your Favorite Annoying Teen

Okay, I'm going for uncensored way too much fucking information here.

But I don't care.

Because really...I'm disappointed.

What is the big fucking hoopla deal around vibrators? Really?
I mean I've looked at them, I've seen them. Yay that have lots of random attachments and some have faces in them and some have rotating bead things and some have bumps and stuff and some go in your underpants and some have remote controls and some dance to your music and some have like hydrolics so your ride can be up the shiz pimped out yo.

But honestly I still find them freaking boring. Because what do they do really except vibrate? I mean there are some cool looking twisty things but I'm not shellin' out $60 plus shipping for that shit just because it does a freaking snake dance in my vag and has some spoon attachment. And then this is this g-spot thing. It's like "OH MAH GOZ g-spot! YOU CAN EVEN MAKE IT GROW!"
Maybe I'm just ignorant but a g-spot to me sounds like something to make men feel better even though most penises supposedly can't even reach the freaking thing.
I mean I've been to two passion parties now and they're just like
"Yay! Lube! You can make your junk smell like strawberries and taste like it too!"
"Do you have natural flavoring?"
"Ew, like omgz who does natural flavoring? Besides, this is to keep you from being bored."
"Well I'm bored with strawberries, mint and fruit and chocolate flavor. Make me some that tastes like steak, mashed potatoes and bread. How about that for a bit of interest?"
Oh and another thing: WHAT IS WITH THE FREAKING PASTEL COLORED NEON FARKING CRAZY ASS COLORS??!
What if I don't want my toy in freaking neons but I don't want "big black man brown" either. It's like, the only ones you might see in real colors are like...the glass ones. I mean those could be fun but...
Anyhoo, not going there even though I am headed everywhere else.
Also what if vibration doesn't do it for you? I mean can they invent alternate method machines?
Maybe this stuff is out there because I actually haven't looked much but nothing I have seen has been very thrilling. I just expected more creativity than "here is this thing that vibrates that you can put in you" or for men "Cock rings and sleeves/masturbators! Yay! Oh and prostate simulators for you brave ones. ;-)"
...
Ugh.
I am a harsh critic. I know this. I guess I will just not be much of an adventurer of the sex toy industry.
I think the vibrators still say as well though "You need a cock to have sex. Even lesbians need imitation cock."
I mean, puuulllleeease....
Grrr, misrepresentation of alternative sexuality and sexual variety...that is a whole other rant. Did you know gay used to not be this lifestyle/identity but was just an act you participated in before the psychologists of the early twentieth century started labeling it? I find that interesting...

Anyhoo. I'm done. Moving on to homework now.
Peace.
~Lo

Your Favorite Annoying Teen Life in the Making
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Previous Entry :: Next Entry Read/Post Comments (4) Share on Facebook A summery of Your Favorite Annoying T... Hello, I am YFAT or Lo. I have been writing/around on Journal Scape for over a decade now. Time flies! This journal chronicles my random thoughts, high moments and sometimes low, throughout high school, college, and now beyond, into the world of "adulthood", whatever that means. Sinerely, ~Lo		2009-04-24 12:05 PM Yes, this is a vibrator rant, approach with caution Okay, I'm going for uncensored way too much fucking information here. But I don't care. Because really...I'm disappointed. What is the big fucking hoopla deal around vibrators? Really? I mean I've looked at them, I've seen them. Yay that have lots of random attachments and some have faces in them and some have rotating bead things and some have bumps and stuff and some go in your underpants and some have remote controls and some dance to your music and some have like hydrolics so your ride can be up the shiz pimped out yo. But honestly I still find them freaking boring. Because what do they do really except vibrate? I mean there are some cool looking twisty things but I'm not shellin' out $60 plus shipping for that shit just because it does a freaking snake dance in my vag and has some spoon attachment. And then this is this g-spot thing. It's like "OH MAH GOZ g-spot! YOU CAN EVEN MAKE IT GROW!" Maybe I'm just ignorant but a g-spot to me sounds like something to make men feel better even though most penises supposedly can't even reach the freaking thing. I mean I've been to two passion parties now and they're just like "Yay! Lube! You can make your junk smell like strawberries and taste like it too!" "Do you have natural flavoring?" "Ew, like omgz who does natural flavoring? Besides, this is to keep you from being bored." "Well I'm bored with strawberries, mint and fruit and chocolate flavor. Make me some that tastes like steak, mashed potatoes and bread. How about that for a bit of interest?" Oh and another thing: WHAT IS WITH THE FREAKING PASTEL COLORED NEON FARKING CRAZY ASS COLORS??! What if I don't want my toy in freaking neons but I don't want "big black man brown" either. It's like, the only ones you might see in real colors are like...the glass ones. I mean those could be fun but... Anyhoo, not going there even though I am headed everywhere else. Also what if vibration doesn't do it for you? I mean can they invent alternate method machines? Maybe this stuff is out there because I actually haven't looked much but nothing I have seen has been very thrilling. I just expected more creativity than "here is this thing that vibrates that you can put in you" or for men "Cock rings and sleeves/masturbators! Yay! Oh and prostate simulators for you brave ones. ;-)" ... Ugh. I am a harsh critic. I know this. I guess I will just not be much of an adventurer of the sex toy industry. I think the vibrators still say as well though "You need a cock to have sex. Even lesbians need imitation cock." I mean, puuulllleeease.... Grrr, misrepresentation of alternative sexuality and sexual variety...that is a whole other rant. Did you know gay used to not be this lifestyle/identity but was just an act you participated in before the psychologists of the early twentieth century started labeling it? I find that interesting... Anyhoo. I'm done. Moving on to homework now. Peace. ~Lo Read/Post Comments (4) Previous Entry :: Next Entry Back to Top