I am getting more involved with Real Estate now. I have the one listing and I am trying for another. I am also working with a buyer to find a home. She is the dean of natural science at the new UC Merced. The new UC is bringing a lot of new people to the area. It is really going to help our economy here.

I am also working on my website and bio for advertising. It is good to keep busy. I find myself missing Stuart terribly. I have great pictures of him around. I might put them away for awhile again, because every time I see one, I get a sharp pain in my gut. I think I'll go see my counsellor again. My physical pains had died down a little. But they are growing more intensly again. Time to go to the doctor. :/ I usually feel better after I do. It seems strange to me, but it is really like getting medicine for a cold. Except the cold keeps coming back. Sometimes the cold is mild and sometimes it feels like neumonia.

Work is a good distraction and pays the bills. But it is hard. I am so spoiled :) And Allex is a great distraction! Most times, I am consumed and content by taking care of him. I am just feeling sorry for myself because it is late. Poor me :< I'm sure tomorrow will be better. I didn't intend to be depressing....sorry

On a happier note, I love living with my grandmother. I savor this time with her. She teaches me so much and her company is refreshing. And I love working for my uncle. He is a great example of a good businessman and a good person. His wife, my aunt, is also a blessing. She is such a good person and also a good example. I realize that as old as I feel, I still have a lot to learn. Every day, I'll get up and breathe and see what happens after that.