The votes are in. The decision is unanimous. We don't need no stinkin' clip art. Possibly we need elephants but not clip art. And I like elephants, so that works. Also as part of this random paragraph of news, LANDMARKED FOR MURDER got reviewed again. And it was a nice review. (Of course, it was because honestly, if it wasn't, I wouldn't mention it here.) You can read it for yourself by going to crimestalkers.com, clicking on the "book review" link at the bottom and then scrolling down again to find the review. Or you take my word for it that it was very complimentary.

In other news, I sent my husband to the bookstore a block from his office to buy one gift, one gift this whole holiday season out of the approximately seven hundred and ninety-two I've already taken care of. Let's review how that went, shall we?

A week ago, I received a very nice, very polite e-mail from my mother-in-law. A year or so ago, I'd bought her a copy of TOO BIG TO MISS by my buddy and awesome humorist Sue Ann Jaffarian. (You see her website and blog at www.sueannjaffarian.com.) The e-mail suggested that were I out shopping this fine holiday season and feeling the need to purchase her a gift, I might consider obtaining a copy of Sue Ann's sequel CURSE OF THE HOLY PAIL. What went unwritten, but clearly understood by me, was that the only way it could possibly be worth the hassle of having a writer for a daughter-in-law is if she could get her friends to sign some freakin' books for the love of Christ.

The good news was Sue Ann was already planning on doing a signing at that nifty bookshop a block from my husband's office. The bad news was that I wouldn't be able to make it. I'd have to send him. Alone.

I had planned for all possible contingencies. I called the bookstore, which knows me personally, and reserved a copy of the book. I told them my husband's name. I told them the day and time he would be there to retrieve it. I wrote Sue Ann and told her he'd be coming and to look for him, lest he become lost between the front door and her table. I told her my mother-in-law's name (at Sue Ann's suggestion) just in case he should forget it.

What could possibly go wrong?

The manager of the bookstore called me last night. "Um, your husband is here. There's some confusion. What's he supposed to buy exactly?"

There isn't enough spiked egg nog in all the land...