1) 5000 words to go. But. I really don't feel anything for this paper, which is worrying. I'm aiming to be competent, not anything else. I know it's kind of blah. I don't care anymore. I can't care anymore. Every other module is coming up roses (and I mean, roses by my standards). I've never been so uninspired in a module. This is the first history module I can safely say I regret taking. I don't think I learnt very much and now I'm going to add a shit paper to it too. Sighs.

In line with that... I read some of the stuff I wrote in Year 1.

11 August 2009: "Attended my first University lecture: History!=) I am such the sucker for fun and funny history teachers; they always make me feel like I should major in the subject."

Where did that girl go, I wonder. (She's still here, buried under a mountain of notes, it seems.)

People are beginning to get wind of my results. Enough said.

2) I need to just... finish this and focus on my HT. As people have rightfully pointed out, that's really where I am in stinking trouble and frankly, it's the last thing I have to do to get the degree I want. Nothing else really matters anymore.

3) Christmas is in town. But I am just not in the mood. I wonder if this will recover after I graduate or is this an irreversible decline as I pass from birthday to birthday.