POST-STANDARD July 13,1974

By Audrey (Kentuckypine)





Anyone who says raising children is a hard job has
evidently never heard of the "choice principle."
Basically, this principal removes all feelings of guilt
from the parent and transfers them to the child. This, of
course, does not work as well with preschoolers as it does
with teen-age beasties.

Once children have learned to master the English language
to a point where they say "no," and know what they
are saying, application of the choice principle becomes a
relatively easy matter.

For example: There's a sink load of dirty dishes and you
want to get them washed, but you don't want to do them.
So, this is what you do. Look around the house and
find the best possible candidate, Tina for instance. She’s 14
and likes to ride her bike, go to the movies, swimming or any
one of several little activities.

It just so happens that the movie tonight is one she has
been waiting weeks to see. So you say quietly, "There're
some dishes that need doing. How would you like to help
old mom out?"

If she's like most teen-agers, she'll give you the standard
answer. "No, not me. I did them last time!"

This is where the choice principle comes in. Instead of
screaming and crying, you simply say, "That's okay. If
you don't want to go to the movies, it's perfectly okay with
me."

Suddenly you can hear the water running in the kitchen
sink. You didn't give a direct order, so you can always tell
her friends that you are a "cool mother" because you never
"make her do anything she doesn't want to do." The
feeling of guilt always goes to the child, leaving your conscience
clear.

Let's face it parents, we spend too much time ordering
our youngsters around and not letting them make their
own decisions. The choice principle not only gets the job
done; it allows for the growth of our offspring.

I have found the principle to work very well with my
own five beasties and I thought I was quite bright about it.
That was until I overheard my daughter refer to me as a
"benevolent dictator."