Kick out the Jams, Rage
White Girl, Soul Coughing
I'm not the Man, 10,000 Maniacs
On a plain, Nirvana

A little bit ago I was really pissed off and not I'm not so much anymore, it's just that I got some mail that really pissed me off, but the mood has passed.

I'm still irritated that people are okey with completely ignoring my chapter. If we do something that might help them out, they jump all over it even if they unmask themselves as gaming munchkins in the process. But if what we do is a little off center then the response is to ignore us. But now it's getting to the point where we're not only getting ignored but we're getting *trampled.*

The petty details:
The second weekend of every month has been secured for Phoenix House for several months now and people have been getting used to it. I make it clear at every ST meeting and in every invite I send out. Marianne's chapter decided to hold their game in the middle of our weekend on our Saturday.

Do I sound possesive? Good. Garnering attention is tough for us and moving dates makes it hard to keep our attendence up. And on top of that people think that they can just place their games wherever without checking if someone else already has that night.

Marianne said that she didn't pick the night but wanted to work with me to straighten it out. I don't really think that she would try to step on us just like that but there are folks in her chapter who are convinced that the sun rises with her and sets in their collective asses.

Anyway before I could reach Marianne to work this out I get a message telling me that there will be a television crew from one of the local stations to tape bits of their game. There's no way to fix this. They can't really cancel their game and there really isn't a feasible way to join my game with hers with what I know of her plots. And anyway I was going to run Mage on Saturday night.

So I wrote to her telling her I'd cancel my Cam/Anarch game and move the Mage game to Friday night. If I do *anything* else I'll look like a crybaby and a bitch at the same time. But see I wrote to her while I was still furious and that colored my email a good bit.

She wrote back upset that I was annoyed with her. I don't tend to care if people get unhappy when I have something harsh to say. I don't intend to hurt people but if the time comes for harsh words, then it's also time for thick skin and listening carefully. I don't like to be ignored and if I can't do the job I'm expected to do then I get really annoyed.

I hope she does call me soon so I can explain I'm not really mad at her, but that I feel hurt by this. But mostly I hope she doesn't turn around and tell the whole world that I'm a bitch without at least learning *why* I'm so upset.

But I'm still ticked.