There is only one you... Don't you dare change just because you're outnumbered.

Charles Swindoll


*****


I found a recent comment a little bit disconcerting. Someone made an assumption. Perhaps projecting their own concerns. The comment, made very public, indicated that perhaps I needed bolstering.

Well, who the donkey-nose doesn't. But it's very important that you all know I need less bolstering than most people... far less. And that's because I know.

I know.

I know when I wake up in the morning it's going to be the best day possible. I know this because I've been given the day to fill and complete as I please... the pleasures of hearing a songbird, visiting with friends, or nibbling on Joan's cornbread.

I know.

I also know what will eventually take my soul flight.

I know.

This is one of the most important things I know. I no longer worry about every creak and ache in my aging body. I no longer worry that I may have to take a nap or two every day. I no longer worry that I take fistfuls of medicines. I no longer wonder about clinical trials and looking for hope in a test tube. I no longer worry about qualifying for a lung transplant. I know that I'm not in remission. I know I will never have another doctor's appointment. I know my illness is here to stay.

I know.


I know all about oxygen hunger and how to soothe my body when it needs more, which is slowly but surely coming in short supply.

I know. I know. I know.

I know when my lungs wrestle for oxygen - my hands shake as I open the vial to take pills that will calm my breathing... I know. This can be quite frightening because I live alone and still try to do everything. I know I can't anymore. I know. Knowing this has become a gift of freedom. I gladly let go. Yet, I know what to do when oxygen hunger strikes... because it will again and again and again.


I know and that means I have no room for denial. There are no surprises in my life anymore because I know.


*****


What you don't know:

Every twitch and tweak is reason for alarm because you don't know what I know. It's all very simple and brilliant and wonderful for me and impossibly horrible for you. (Most sincere apologies if that observation seems unkind, insensitive.)

Don't fret for me. Don't assume anything about me. Don't pity me. Don't argue with me. Just don't. I'm so far ahead of you in this game called life - because I know.

I'm the lucky one because I know.


The most important thing I know is that I'm loved by so many amazing people and I can never thank them enough.





*****





Canoe on Clifftops Lake






Visitors for the 4th of July Weekend



As always, thanks for stopping by.


Love.