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To Truly Protect the Sanctity of Marraige

"I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee."--Genesis 3:16

(In the not too distant future . . .)

The twenty-eighth amendment (also known as the defense of marraige amendment) to the Constitution, stating that marraige is a religious institution between one man and one woman came under its most difficult test yesterday as the Supreme Court refused to grant a stay of execution to Jennifer White, who killed her husband in Texas last year after he allegedly raped her.

Attorneys for Mrs. White had hoped to have the stay of execution granted by arguing that the method of execution was both cruel and unusual punishment.

The high court refused this argument under first amendment freedom of religion clauses stating, "As the method of execution is set in biblical text, and Mrs. White has admitted upon numerous occassions to being a Christian, the punishment as set down by God cannot be ruled cruel and unusual by this court."

As the defense of marraige amendment specifically outlawed divorce and set punishments per religious adherance, the court ruled that under Dueteronomy 22:28-29, the execution, via stoning, could commence.

A candle-light vigil held last night for Mrs. White concluded this morning as the protesters were ushered to a free-speech area outside the prison grounds in order to ensure the security of those selected via lottery to participate in the stoning.

In keeping with the religious sanctity of this event, this newspaper has purposefully declined to interview Mrs. White, nor to publish any of her last words.

"Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression."--1 Tim. 2:11-14

Joseph Haines, signing off from The Edge of the Abyss.

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