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I use scissors for lots of things: snipping the string to open packages, sliding the blades along strapping tape to open boxes, cutting open envelopes of medication (shipped in the kind of plastic that Will Not Tear), and so forth.

My SO uses scissors, too. And when he uses them, they disappear. They are not stashed in drawers or under the bed. I don't know where they are.

So I decide to flood the market with scissors. I go down to the nearest 99 cent store and I buy a dozen pairs of scissors. I put one in the drawer under the counter where the coffee pot sits, one in the drawer under the microwave, one in the pen/pencil holder on the table, and so forth.

Gradually, these disappear also, until we're down to one pair of scissors in the kitchen. And then, finally, the time comes and that one is MIA also.

By this time I'm beginning to wonder what the heck is going on. Are they being thrown in the trash by the absent-minded professor? Is a burglar stealthing through the house at night, his only purpose to purloin scissors? Are they morphing into wire clothes hangers? I look at the closets with suspicion growng in my mind....

This morning, a miracle: scissors everywhere, heaped on counters and tabletops. I ask my SO where they came from. He gives me a blank look and says they were just there, in his way, so he put them out. (Not put them away, you notice--his excuse for not putting things away is that he 'doesn't know what I want to do with them').

I really don't understand the life cycle of scissors, but I'm glad to have close to two dozen pairs of scissors again. There are now scissors everywhere, upstairs and down, waiting for the turn of events in order to disappear once again and the cycle repeat.

Must check closets to see if there are now fewer hangers.

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