yes. another bad day.
like its anything new. bad days are everyday now. sec 4 is turning out to be shit. pure and utter shit.
its test and test and test again with the results coming back and telling me that i'm simply not working hard enough or maybe just not smart enough.
whichever the case, i'm feeling very stressed now. today was especially bad cos i got back chinese and guess what. 55 out of 110. and 3 out of 20 for summary.
urg.
i dun even wanna think abt it. it was just so bad and it made me feel so shitty.
then there was literature. i dun even noe what the shit i was writing. all i noe was i had to keep writing and that is exactly what i did.
and i noe this shit is just gonna continue all the way to o levels. well good luck to me. cos i can feel my mental health slipping away bit by bit. i think i might lose it by the end of this term. maybe cry a few times in class. wonder how i can die most painlessly.

i remember a weird line from a movie...

the girl said something abt wanting to die "slowly and painfully. so i can remember what it was like to live"

is life really one long painful journey that passes so slowly?
it seems like it to me now. the years of my life stretching out before me like a long hot dusty road with no street signs. all that i can see is the road ahead. nth to the side. nth to the back...
everything is bleak and hopeless. i dunno where i'm going. and i dunno if i'll like it there.