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Yesterday some friends and I held a marathon viewing of the first season of Homeland. It is well-done, no question, though by the end I found myself feeling quite uncomfortable.

First, the main male character's voice. He always speaks in a semi-whisper; just once I'd like to hear him say something distinctly, clearly, articulately.

Second, I found the main female character's devolution, off her meds, into manic phase personally distressing to watch. And then her crash into deep depression equally unsettling. Others in the group watching the video were dismissing the actions as soap opera-ish.

I finally had to say, that no, as a person who lived with a parent who was psychotic, (might be called affective schizophrenic schizoaffective disorder these days), the portrayal was highly accurate. It gave me nightmares last night; I remembered things I had put away for decades.

Forgetting is the mind's way of protecting the psyche. People who keep resurrecting the past and poking it back into life suffer the pain over and over. I prefer to let it remain quiescent, ignored, so that the past doesn't poison the past/future.

I'm not sure I can bear to watch the second season. Too close to home.

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